A caring brother
by Oreias
Summary: Gaara is falling deeper and deeper into depression due to the loss of Shukaku. Temari playing the mother hen isn't really helping either but there seems to be one person that really understands what he needs, his brother, Kankuro. SANDCEST in the making!
1. Siblings I

CHAPTER I

Gaara sat by the table, eating the breakfast that Temari had so graciously made for him. Kankuro sat in front of him eating scrambled eggs while Gaara himself only ate a piece of toast and some green tea. He had never been much of an eater anyway but this morning he was barely touching his food, just nibbling the edges of the sandwich with nothing on it, holding it in his left hand while his right hand was resting in his lap.

"Are you alright?"

"Nh?"

"You look unusually down, Gaara.."

"Nh…"

Dark brown eyes watched seafoam ones which had looked up from staring at the table and they revealed nothing but a blank stare at the brown eyes which were him to mouth how he was.

"I'm fine… leave me alone."

The monotone voice said as seafoam colored eyes fell back to staring at the table again.

"Just asking Gaara… I'm your brother, I care ya know."

"We both do, Kankuro and I are your siblings. It's our right to care about you."

Temari said as she turned around from the stove and walked to the table while holding a plate full of pancakes. The redhead watched the load on it as she put it down on the table by him and gave her usual big sister look.

"I said I'm fine.."

"But you see Gaara, I can tell you're not."

"Nh?"

"I can tell because you're eating less than usual and you avoid eye contact which you usually don't do. Kankuro is right to ask you how you are."

Temari sat down on a chair beside her youngest brother, looking at him as he placed the half eaten toast on the small plate in front of him and placed both hands casually on his lap.

"What's bothering you?"

"…. I've just ... hn…never mind… I'm fine, I can deal with –"

"Obviously Not Gaara..."

Kankuro cut in, earning a glare from his brother in return, telling him to shut it or else. But of course, privileged as the older brother, he chose that the right he did have, was to continue what he started to say.

"Whatever it is it's affecting your work as the kazekage and people are getting worried about you… I even heard a couple of guards on rounds last night talk about you and that you're even less social than you're usually are, and that's not good… not if you are to keep your role as kazekage."

The voice was soft and caring but Gaara could hear what he saw as pity in his brother's voice and his sister was just too close for comfort, causing him to stand up and step away from his chair and walked out of the kitchen.

"I'm fine, don't bother… I don't need pampering or pity..!"

"Gaara..?!"

Temari rose to go after him but Kankuro stopped her.

"Temari, wait. Let him be for a few days. He's had a rough time lately just let him breathe for a while. It's not like losing a demon you've carried since birth as well as dying and returning to life is something you get over during a couple of weeks. Can you imagine the trauma he's been through? Not even Gaara is unbreakable despite what he's been through… just imagine what he must be bottling up right now…"

"I know but…"

"Temari… leave him alone. I'm sure he'll come around eventually but for now he obviously needs more space than usual. Perhaps we should tell the council that the Kazekage needs a few days off? It would probably only serve in his favor."

Temari sighed and sat back down by the table and nodded quietly. Kankuro was right but she couldn't help but being concerned for Gaara's actions and behavior it was so unlike him. After all, they had known each other for Gaara's entire life but it wasn't until later they had managed to forge a small bond between them. It happened after Uzumaki Naruto during the Chuunin Exams. A remarkable boy he was that blonde. Somehow he had managed to get a thought planted in Gaara's mind in the forest surrounding Konohagakure where they had fought. Gaara fighting to feel he was alive, and Naruto to protect and save Sakura as well as prove himself to Sasuke.

Kankuro grabbed a pancake with his hand, flopped it on his plate put some jam on it then rolled it up with both hands and folded it in the middle before sticking the edges into his mouth.

"Kankuro! Use the fork at least!"

"But it doesn't taste as good!"

An older sister-stare made him place the pancake back down and grabbed his fork with a grumble and looked down at the pancake before a grin appeared on his yet to be painted-lips before he poked the fork through the folded and rolled up pancake and put it to his mouth again, causing Temari to groan loudly.

"When are you ever going to learn table manners, Kankuro?"

"The day I get the nobel prize for flower picking"

"Like that's going to happen…"

"Exactly… and there's your answer!"

He grinned proudly at the remark and took another bite on the pancake, earning another glare from Temari who rose and went to the kitchen cabinets and brought another plate out and placed it on a tray together with a fork and a knife, a glass of orange juice and a napkin.

"Temari… leave him be..."

"I'm not going to let him starve himself, he's already thin and I don't want to see him fade away by lack of food when he came back to us from the dead, Kankuro… You can't stop me from caring, Ever."

Kankuro sighed but accepted his defeat, she was right. Gaara had lost weight in the last weeks and by the amount he was eating, lack of food was indeed part of the reason why.

"I never said you'd stop caring Temari…"

Gaara sat down on his bed with a slight sigh and lowered his head. It was so empty, everything was so quiet and he had never in his entire life felt the way he did now. The annoying thing was that he couldn't even explain what he did feel, emotions weren't really his strongest side much less find the word connecting to the feeling itself. A soft knock on the door woke him up from the attempt of trying to find the word he was looking for.

"Leave"

He said to the door but he was out of luck. Temari turned the knob and came inside with a tray.

"Since you didn't finish your breakfast, I brought the breakfast to you. You eat up Gaara, no questions asked."

"I said I don't need pampering , Temari…"

"This is not Pampering Gaara… this is caring. Have you looked at yourself lately? You've lost weight and your pale skin is even paler… which I didn't think was possible but obviously I was wrong."

She placed the tray down on Gaara's desk and turned to look at him as he stood up a bit shorter than her still. They shared a moment of 'stare down' before Gaara eventually snorted a sigh and gave up.

"Fine… I'll eat if you leave"

"That's all I really wanted from the start, Gaara… You eating."

Temari placed a light hand on his shoulder and gave a warm sisterly smile, earning a glare of "don't touch me and don't you dare pamper me!" before she left and closed the door behind her, but not without telling him he didn't need to bother with the tray, she could come back for that later.

Once the door closed, Gaara sighed again and walked over to the desk and slumped down on the chair and just blankly stared at the pancakes and juice before him. Nothing on it, just the way he wanted them but with a touch of vanilla in the mix to give it a slight flavor. The redhead never had much of a sweet tooth amyway. There were a few things that he did like that was sweet but he was very picky when it came to 'treats' but he usually liked salt and sour things better than sweet ones.

A deep sigh escaped his lips before he picked the fork up… fork… why on earth had Temari gone to 'see the world' again? What was wrong with chopsticks and rice? Now he had to eat this… 'pancake' with a fork since he had realized that the pancake wasn't something you had in a bowl and pre-cut the last time he had it. He did like it however and that was something he just couldn't deny and that was something Temari had seen in an instant when he had tasted it a week ago and she was obviously proud of making them correctly too since all she had was a recipe from one of her new friends.

It had taken him a good two hours to try to eat the three pancakes on the plate but the juice had gone down easier. One and a half pancake still remained on the plate where Gaara had left them with the empty juice glass before he had returned to his bed to lay down.

Yet again he found himself cradled up on his right side staring at the wall with a blank look on his face, knees somewhat pulled up to his chest, back to the desk and door. Everything was silent; nothing was heard except the slight wind outside the window. He had heard Temari washing dishes a while ago but it seemed she had either forgotten about the plate in his room or simply let him be. Unless Kankuro made her wait with it, his older brother seemed to understand him a bit somehow. He let Gaara have his space when he needed to and somehow he did understand when he needed it too, perhaps he had let his patterns and routines and personality show too much so he could read him… possibly.

So cold… everything was so cold. He felt so shut off from the world even though there was an entire city around him as well as his siblings. Nothing had been the same since that day. He was missing something and it wasn't only Shukaku's voice inside of him but it felt like he had lost something else. He felt hollow, empty and… perhaps a bit... lost.

The redhead had moved to the bed, pulling his knees up towards his chest . He whimpered and shut his eyes tightly as his left hand came to grab a tuft of hair by his temple and pulled his knees up even tighter. What was this pain inside? It ached and gnawed at him, it stung and burned at the same time he felt numb inside…

Page 3 of 3


	2. Leave II

CHAPTER II

Gaara suddenly flicked his eyes up in panic and swung around in the bed, drawing his sand from the gourd at once. Someone was in the room. With a loud yelp and a thud to the floor once the sand got the intruder pinned, a choked try of speaking was heard. Once Gaara realized he had made sure the intruder couldn't do anything, he released the sand around the throat and heard several chokes and coughs before a familiar voice was heard, a raspy familiar voice but a voice he knew nonetheless.

"G-Gaara… it's me… Kankuro..."

"K-Kankuro..?"

"I... I was just going to get your tray...didn't want to… wake you…"

He coughed again but the bewildered younger brother was freaked and was breathing quite hard and… was he sweating? Kankuro frowned on the floor, pinned by the sand from the Kazekage's gourd but chose not to fight back since that usually only resulted in the stand making a stronger grip, much like a snake squeezing it's pray to death.

Gaara grabbed his head on both sides by his temples while sitting in the bed and pulled his knees up against his chest while closing his pale green eyes. He managed to choke a whimper but Kankuro knew his brother well and his brother never choked any whimpers… ever he never even whimpered... ever! Something was really wrong and all he wished was for the younger brother to open up and actually talk to him!

"Gaara… please… let me go… I mean no harm you know that…"

He said softly, trying the kind way of making his brother listen since violence only made things worse, that was something he had learned the hard way while growing up, come to think of it he was glad he was still alive. Gaara blinked a few times then glanced over at Kankuro on the floor in the dim room, thick curtains keeping the dusk hidden from view. He must have been asleep for the entire day… unless it was a storm coming up and the sky darkened because of that it was quite hard to tell at the moment.

"nh…"

He replied and the sand slowly removed itself from Kankuro's body, the older brother taking a breath of gratitude to the gods for listening on his prayer. The puppet master slowly sat up on the floor and looked Gaara over again and furrowed his eyebrows. The redhead looked less than okay by far but still he wasn't willing to share his problems…

"Gaara…"

"Shut up... I'm fine…"

He said and winched as the deafening screams became louder in his head. Had it been a dream or had it been reality what he had just witnessed? He shuddered a breath and swallowed before glancing down at Kankuro still sitting on the floor. He was still here, he was a person he knew… Gaara swallowed again.

"Leave…"

He said with a very soft voice with almost some… emotion? Kankuro blinked again but slowly rose from the floor and nodded then moved carefully towards the tray only to see Gaara had barely eaten anything and since Kankuro knew that Gaara loved these pancakes (as well as he did) he got even more worried. Sure, his little brother had never been a big eater but this was less than a normal portion of food for him, this was getting to him.

"Hey… Gaara, you sure you're okay? You've barely eaten…"

Kankuro turned to look at Gaara who gave him a death glare between the panic attack he was trying to get control over.

"Fine, Leave!"

"Okay, okay! I'm leavin' … but please… if you need to talk you know where to find me alright? And what we talk about, I won't share with anyone unless you tell me to."

"nh…"

With that, Kankuro reluctantly left his younger brother but not without a second glance at the door as if asking if he shouldn't stay a while until Gaara had calmed down but there was no indication that the redhead wanted him to, so he left with a light sigh at the door. Should he tell Temari this? Or would it just get worse?.... mmm… yeah it would probably get worse, she was worse than a mother hen and especially around Gaara, which of course only made him pissed off even though she only meant well.

Kankuro went into the kitchen and threw the rest of the pancakes in the trash before he cleaned the plate, dried it off and put it back in the cabinet since Temari already made the dishes for today. He couldn't help but wonder who he could possibly talk to about this matter. There had to be someone he could at least consult in this entire ordeal, the question was who? Things just seemed to get worse during each passing day and what it seemed Gaara couldn't really separate his bad dreams to reality anymore and that was a really bad sign. If the Kazekage couldn't keep his sanity he would be replaced and since Gaara had wanted to become the best ninja in his village after meeting Naruto at the chuunin exams, Kankuro would hate to see him loose the position.

"Gaara… What am I to do with you?"

He whispered and looked outside on the raging sandstorm that blew over the surrounding rocks and cliffs around their city. It was a storm after all…


	3. Nightmares III

CHAPTER III

Two weeks later Kankuro had just finished his rounds around the city and his shift had just come to an end. Everything had been rather calm after Gaara's return back to the living except for a little brother not really feeling well but that was kind of expected for those who knew what he had been through. The problem was that not many knew how Gaara really felt and behaved behind closed doors like Kankuro and Temari did.

The puppet master had returned back home after chiyo-baasama's funeral even though Kakashi-Sensei had looked like he was ready to faint during the few days they stayed and that even though Gai-sensei had promised he was in good hands on the way home after a while of staying to rest up at least before they left. No one could however make them stay if they didn't want to but the company had been good nonetheless.

From what Kankuro had heard about Gai and Kakashi, they were supposed to be rivals but from what he could see when the two teams left, they seemed more to be really good friends than anything else. In other words, a really good teamwork ever since they were genin, he gathered and through that teamwork the so called "rivalry" had grown as well. Something Kankuro knew well considering he had always seen Gaara as his rival even though they were brothers.

At first he had only seen Gaara as a pest, a nuisance that was in the way of his career even though they shared a blood line. After the chuunin exams, hearing Gaara ask for forgiveness when he had helped him home together with Temari things had drastically changed at home. The redhead had really tried to change, to try and understand how to care and how to feel even though the later was something he still didn't understand now four years after the exams.

Kankuro walked down the halls of the kazekage home to get to his room which more resembled a small apartment which Gaara had so graciously given him, as well as he had given Temari a room in the building and who were they to say no to live close to the kazekage? Could you live in a safer place than that? And… could you live in a place more aimed on for attacks than that?... Kankuro was ripped out of his thoughts when he heard some form of whimpering coming from somewhere, causing him to stop and listen. Did he really hear something or was he getting too tired and ending up hearing things that weren't there? He stopped breathing and just stood still by a statue in the hallway, letting himself blend with the shade it brought in the darkness of the night.

There it was again… He turned around and listened, trying to figure out from where it came while quietly back-tracking his steps door to door until he realized the whimpering seemed to come from Gaara's chambers. Kankuro frowned and softly knocked on the door just in case Gaara wanted to be on his own if he was awake.

"Gaara? Are you okay?"

He asked quietly but there was no sound or reply back. He knocked again and called his brother's name carefully but still there was no reply, only a soft whimper again and it sounded pained or at least unsafe from Gaara's point of view.

It was true Gaara was still learning how to sleep after Shukaku had left his body but he still had trouble to see the difference between dreams and reality that much was clear. Even though he slept a few hours a night now it still seemed like the dark shades around his eyes got even darker if that was possible at all? Kankuro had been there a few times to try and soothe him the day after, to talk him through it like a big brother should and to be honest, he really felt for Gaara he loved the guy like the little brother he had become. The two had come so much closer since Shukaku left, much closer than Gaara had let him be after the chuunin exams even though the redhead was still resistant to share things about himself but at least the constant threats of killing him if he did something the redhead didn't like had stopped a good while ago and that in itself was calming to the mind to say the least.

Kankuro still stood outside Gaara's door unable to get a response out of him. What if he was held captive by someone and wasn't able to speak? No one knew what effect it would have on Gaara after Shukaku was drawn out of him and he was returned to life again which caused everybody to be on edge…. Everybody that knew that was. But the knowledge of him not having Shukaku within him anymore also made him an easier target due to lack of strength as he had with the demon inside. He still hadn't perfect control over the sand as it was currently and Kankuro knew this because he had seen Gaara walk out to a place in the middle of the desert where he could train and try to get his gifts back on track again.

Kankuro slowly turned the door handle only to realize that the door was indeed open, usually Gaara closed and locked it but… considering the events he had been through, he didn't blame his brother not remembering to lock the door. He went inside quietly after glancing around the corridor that no one was following him and closed the door behind him once he was inside, locking it to make sure no one else followed inside.

"Gaara?"

He asked quietly, looking around in the darkness just as he heard another whimper coming from the left far end of the room as sheets rustled by movement. Kankuro walked over there with quiet steps only to realize that Gaara was indeed in his bed, sleeping and of what it seemed like with the fussing he was having a nightmare it seemed he couldn't wake up from.

"Ssh… Gaara, it's okay…"

Kankuro murmured softly and leaned down to run a hand over the top of his little brother's head. A soft whimper and a worried mine appeared on Gaara's face while he fussed under the cover. It seemed he was trying to fight something in his sleep by the judging of his waving of hands and kicking of legs while trying to protect himself by covering his body with crossed forearms at the same time.

The painted warrior slowly sat down on the bed while running his hand over his brother's hair still, hushing him softly even though he realized that it didn't really do much to help his brother calm his dreams. On the other hand… he understood why at a certain level too. Gaara wasn't used to be touched and he wasn't used to be comforted either since he had never let anyone close to himself since he was six years old, except Naruto that was.

"Ssh… calm your dreams Otouto-chan"

He whispered. Gaara still fussed and the covers that had been covering his body, eventually slid down to reveal a soft looking ivory chest well toned and perfect in shape. That sand armor of his really did make him look beautiful once it was off, a pale perfect skin without as much as a scratch. His thoughts were interrupted when Gaara suddenly sat up with half a scream, knocking his forehead right into Kankuro's, causing him to yelp and groan in pain and fall to the floor just beside the bed at the same time Gaara growled in pain as well, cupping his forehead and nose before he realized someone was there with him.

"Who's there!?"

He asked in a bewildered growl and Kankuro could hear the sand forming from the gourd instantly.

"I-It's me… Kankuro, your brother..!"

He said quickly while holding his forehead, taking the headband off before going inside Gaara's room was a bad idea, and he made a mental note never to do that again. The sand calmed in its movements when the redhead heard the familiar voice and it seemed the sand crawled back to form the gourd beside the nightstand again.

"…Kankuro?"

He asked quietly as if still dreaming but registering the name, still rather shaken up due to the dream as he pulled his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them while his left hand came to wipe over his forehead with his palm, the right hand placing itself by the crook of his left elbow. He swallowed and closed his eyes for a moment while hearing Kankuro getting up on his knees before crawling up to sit on his beside.

"It sounded like you had a bad dream so I came to check on you…"

Kankuro said softly while watching his brother hide his face in his hands, lowering his face towards his knees. The younger boy didn't give a reply so Kankuro continued with a soft voice while pondering if he dared to touch his little brother or not considering he usually growled or gave a killing stare if you did or possibly even hit back when you came too close.

"What was the dream about, Otouto-chan?"

Gaara shook his head and Kankuro thought he heard a small whimper; he obviously didn't want to talk about it.

"Hey… you okay?"

He furrowed his eyebrows and placed a light but warm right hand on Gaara's left shoulder and the completely unexpected happened. Gaara leaned in and wrapped his arms around him, hiding his face by the crook of Kankuro's neck. At first he didn't know how to react but his arms soon wrapped around his baby brother holding him in a warm embrace as if reassuring him that everything was fine.

"hey ,hey!…ssh… easy now, calm down. Take a few breaths, okay? I'm here, Gaara… no worries."

He spoke softly and gently rubbed his little brother's back with his left hand while hearing the redhead following his advice on breathing He held his right one around the teenager's shoulders while allowing the redhead to hide his face by his shoulder.

Did he just hear a sob?

Since Gaara obviously wasn't really talkative at the moment, Kankuro remained hugging him close, comforting him but he didn't complain. This was so strange, never in his entire life had Gaara showed any form of feelings or affection, not since his uncle tried to kill him when he was at the age of six at least, and much less the willingness to actually touch someone else and here he was holding his arms willingly around him and actually seeking comfort.

"Ssh… ssh… It's just a bad dream… it's not real."

Gaara nodded against his shoulder and Kankuro let his cheek rest against the redhead's hair while he realized that his brother was indeed trembling, whether it was out of fear or the intensity of the dream he wasn't sure of, but he knew he just couldn't leave Gaara this way and return to his own quarters.

"Gaara… please… what was the dream about? You're trembling, what spooked you so badly?"

He asked still with the same soft voice that wanted to soothe him as much as he could. Gaara took another few moments before he willed himself a few times over to calm down before he tried to unwillingly release the warm safe embrace he sat in, hip beside hip with Kankuro, his brother still having his feet on the floor by the bed, Gaara having his legs half way pulled towards his chest under the cover somewhat allowing his brother to rest his right elbow on his knee if he wanted to.

"… It… it's nothing.."

The boy said with a quiet and raspy voice. The moist stain on Kankuro's shoulder told him that his brother had been crying and that was something that just did not happen! He kept running a soft hand over Gaara's back and gently pulling him towards him in a brief attempt of telling the boy it was okay to remain in the hug if he wanted to – Kankuro felt his brother wanted to even though he wasn't sure if he knew that himself.

"… J-just… a bad dream…"

"About what? … If you tell me we can sort it out together, Otouto-chan.."

"nh…"

Gaara lowered his forehead against his bigbrother's shoulder again, allowing himself to be pulled into the comforting hug he so desperately needed.

"…It… it was about Shukaku…"

He started hesitatingly and half muffled against Kankuro's black suna-shirt.

Page 4 of 4


	4. Blood bonds IV

CHAPTER IIII

"What did he do?"

The soft circling motion on his back by Kankuro's hand began to calm him down more and more but he felt he just wanted to remain in the embrace as if it was a 'now or never' or a 'once in a lifetime'-chance to be completely out of character – society masks off.

"…H-he… he attacked the village, making me watch every kill without being able to do anything… I was frozen where I stood... He ripped limbs off and ate them while the villagers were still alive and…and he killed everybody… he…nh… he said he wanted revenge…. On me… told me I was all alone in the world now and he would make sure he'd kill anyone I cared for even the slightest... h-he said … no one cared about me other than trying…to….to kill me… right before he attacked me… I… I had no control over him…. None… he swallowed me whole…and… nh… that's… where… that's where it all started… complete hell….."

He swallowed at the remark, still mumbling into Kankuro's shoulder while the strong comforting arms remained around him, his big brother listening on Gaara's ramble about his bad dream in silence, allowing his usually so quiet baby brother to talk.

"… I was thrown into an abyss of… of nothing, I was floating in nothing while he told me I was damned to be abandoned no matter how much I strived for the opposite… then he showed me how he killed every single person I care about as slow and painful as he possibly could while I could do nothing… Nothing!"

He paused for a moment and tried to hide a sob by making an attempt of choking it.

"… every person I've dared myself to care for…"

He added with a half broken voice while struggling with the sobbing. Kankuro listened and was just about to answer when Gaara spoke again.

"…it's so quiet… so silent in my head… it's… it's driving me crazy, Kankuro..! I don't know what to do!"

His voice told the big brother that Gaara wanted to panic and if he could, he'd run away far, far from the silence and the dark threats of his mind.

"… You're not alone Gaara… you never will be. I'll be here for as long as you'll have me, as will Temari… and you have that Uzumaki Naruto from Konoha too. Not to mention the entire village of Suna now days.."

"But that's just it!"

Gaara looked up into his brother's eyes all of a sudden, the evidence was clear that he had been crying due to the puffiness of his dark eyelids.

"What is?"

"Shukaku killed everyone just to make sure I would remain alone and…and…."

His voice fell silent the moment he realized himself that he was getting worked up and his eyes fell to the floor.

"and?"

"…and as abandoned as I was after I killed uncle Yashamaru …."

Gaara closed his eyes and Kankuro wrapped his right arm around Gaara's head, pulling him closer into an embrace again while gently rubbing the back of his head.

"That… was just a dream, Gaara… I'm here still and Temari is sleeping in her room too. Suna is still here as well, I just finished my rounds… Nothing's going to happen, not while I'm on watch…"

The painted warrior smiled softly and kissed the top of his brother's head without thinking. That caused Gaara to look up at him again with questioning eyes asking why he did that by a light frown of his right non-existent eyebrow.

"… eh… it's a sign of affection… you know… for people you care about?"

"… Why do you care Kankuro? After everything I put you and Temari through…"

"Because… you're our brother and siblings stick together. Blood is thicker than water and blood bonds are impossible to break."

"No they're not…"

"mmh?"

"They're breakable… if you kill…"

Gaara remarked but Kankuro shook his head.

"No… not even death can break blood bonds, Gaara."

The redhead paused and looked up at his brother again with a look that went straight into Kankuro's heart.

"Why?"

"Because no matter if you are alive or dead, you still have relations to that person that has moved on to the next world. That person is and has a part of you with them just as you have a part of them in you. We all share the same blood."

He paused a moment to see if Gaara followed what he was talking about but the light frown on his baby brother's eyebrow showed him he didn't.

"It's like… like branches of a tree. No matter how many branches you break of, the bud of that broken branch is still there to show where it has once been and by that revealing the kinship to the tree no matter if it's attached to the smallest of branches and is called a twig, or if it's attached to the trunk itself."

Gaara slowly nodded against his shoulder, understanding rather well when he explained it like that.

"nh…"

Was the short answer to his explanation before Gaara lowered his head to Kankuro's shoulder once more, soon followed by another sigh and a choked sob.

"Gaara…"

He said softly, rubbing his brother's hair again.


	5. Coffee V

Chapter V

For the first time in a week, Gaara appeared at the breakfast table and shocked both Kankuro and Temari who sat at the table already. Kankuro was drinking coffee which he had found the liking to, one of the things that Temari had brought back from her travels around the world.

"Gaara..!"

Temari said and instantly rose from the table with a warm smile on her lips.

"Good morning! Would you like some breakfast?"

He nodded quietly and his sister instantly went to get him a cup, some tea that he liked and put some toast in the toaster. The redhead glanced at Kankuro to look at the cup he was holding to his lips. It smelled strange but Gaara still tilted his head to look at his brother, following the cup as it was placed on the table again. Kankuro just gave him a kind look and pretended that the night a few days ago never happened, Gaara didn't complain; quite the opposite actually. They hadn't really seen each other since then either. Temari had been the one to come with food and take the tray away with half eaten food on since Kankuro had been working double shifts for about a week now.

"Gaara, come… sit"

Temari said, placing his tea on the table by his chair at the table at the same time seafoam colored eyes turned to look at her just before he moved towards his chair at the end of the table sitting on the opposite side of Kankuro, Temari to his left and the actual kitchen behind her.

Somehow the silence in the kitchen became thick and you could cut it with a knife without problem. The toast flicked up with a seemingly loud sound in the silence and Temari instantly looked over to the bench before she moved over to get it. Once again Gaara and Kankuro gave each other looks, exchanging unspoken sentences. Just before Temari came back to the table with Gaara's toast on a small plate, Kankuro offered his cup towards his brother.

"Wanna taste? It's real good"

"…what is it?"

"It's called coffee, Temari got it from one of her travels."

"Nh…"

He reached out and took the cup from Kankuro, smelled the aroma of what was in it and frowned slightly with his right brow before he took a sip and made a mine of disgust, causing Kankuro to chuckle softly while taking the cup back.

"It's disgusting…"

The comment caused Kankuro to laugh out instead, Temari giving him a look as if wanting him to shut up of course, just like mother hen's do.

"Why don't you try it with a bit of milk in it? You can drink it that way too"

"nh.."

Gaara nodded to Temari, it couldn't possibly taste worse than it had. She rose again and went to get a cup and poured some coffee in it then some milk and returned to the table and placed it by Gaara.

"I drink it this way, it makes the taste a little softer"

She informed and Gaara once again smelled the aroma, agreeing quietly in his mind that it did smell softer with milk in it. He took a sip and tasted it while Temari and Kankuro watched him for any form of reaction to it.

"Mh… better"

He said in approval, taking another drink of the brown liquid in the cup, for the moment abandoning his tea. Gaara took one of the toasted bread slices and brought in to his mouth, biting one of the corners while his siblings returned to eating as well, pleased that Gaara had found something new he seemed to like, no matter if it was momentarily or not.

~¤~

Gaara had insisted he would work in his office today. He hadn't been at work at all for a week now, all thanks to Kankuro insisting to tell the council that he was ill and had to get better before anyone even dared to come and 'bother' him, and as long as there was not a matter of life and death, Gaara was not to be bothered at home either. Everything was to be tended to by either Baki or Kankuro himself and if seen fit or needed, they would talk to the kazekage but no one else unless the kazekage himself requested it.

Gaara now sat in his office reading through papers that had been stacking up while he had been at home. To be honest nothing had really changed but his feeling of responsibility, as the leader of Suna kept nagging at him and told him he couldn't stay away for too long no matter how much Temari wanted him to rest.

He had been working all day even though it was a slow pace and he had asked not to be disturbed and no one had even knocked on his door or bothered him just as he requested. Things had been calm and good during his absence for a week and that pleased him quite well. The paper work he still needed to sign of course and he had told his brother he could do it and he had been for quite a while now, but as soon as the sun had disappeared behind the sand hills outside, he started to feel uneasy again even though he tried to push it down and try to ignore it. It worked for a while but after a few minutes, panic hit him when the uneasy feeling just wouldn't stay hidden or ignored.

"Ngh..!"

Gaara grabbed tufts of red hair by his temples as the pen dropped down on the document on the desk and rolled away from him. He made a mine of mental pain soon followed by a whimper he couldn't choke and rose from the chair and heard it tip over behind him while he stumbled towards the door to get out of the office.

He got the door open and called his gourd to re-form on his back which it did instantly, the sand moving from being formed as the gourd from resting by his desk, to re-form from a wave of sand in the air, to hang on his back. Gaara groaned, holding himself along the walls to get out getting some fresh air to try and calm his senses. The screaming silence in his head was overwhelming and he simply couldn't take it anymore. The hallways seemed to be so long, so endless. He choked another whimper while still holding his hair by his left temple, his right hand moving along the walls while he walked somewhat crouched over.

"c-can't do this… can't do this!"

He mumbled to himself while turning to the left in the hallway to get out. Just as he opened the door he hit something hard with a groan and stumbled backwards and expected to fall to the floor when someone grabbed his upper arms to steady him. He choked a whimper and exhaled just before he heard a voice he knew well.

"Gaara?... Gaara! Are you okay? "

There was a moment of silence while Gaara tried to form an answer and when it didn't come, he was escorted outside by strong arms leading him.

"Let's take some air… okay?"

"nh…"

He mumbled while still being hunched over when he felt himself being transported somewhere else.

[center]…tbc…[/center]

Page 3 of 3


	6. One gone two left VI

CHAPTER VI

Gaara found himself standing on one of the sand cliffs surrounding Suna by a small mountain peak quite a bit from any guards or people in general. He knew because the only chackra reading he could sense, was his company still holding him when all he wanted to do was fall to the mountain floor and break in little pieces where he stood with eyes still closed.

"Gaara… Gaara, breathe. Focus, listen to me... focus!"

The hands that were holding his shoulders moved up to cup his cheeks, wanting him to look up and meet the eyes that were without a doubt watching him. He kept his eyes clenched shut for a while but after a moment he did what he was asked to do and opened his eyes. Seafoam colored eyes looked haunted and almost panicked when they met the dark familiar eyes before him.

"I… I can't do this!"

His voice came out more shaking than he had wanted but he couldn't do anything about that now, it was already too late now anyway. The strong arms pulled him into a warm embrace and yet again, Gaara tried to choke a sob and a whimper but didn't quite make it.

"Ssh.. ssh… easy now. You [i]can[/i] do this, I'm with you all the way. I'm not going anywhere, just lean on me when you need to."

,

Gaara's head leaned into the well shaped chest, inhaling the familiar scent just as he felt himself break inside. He shook his head as tears welled up even though he tried to choke them down but it was harder than he would have liked and decided he'd just let himself go with it, to release the pain inside.

"There now… I'm with you Otouto"

A hand stroked his hair just like a week ago while he was held tightly towards his brother's body. It didn't take long before Gaara's arms wrapped around his form from having his hands clenched in his hair in panic.

"It's too much! The silence is too much!!"

"You can do this Gaara… Trust me. I believe in you"

Kankuro's voice was soft and comforting while his hand was still running through his baby-brother's hair while Gaara cried more than he had ever cried for a lifetime and he couldn't do anything to stop it either. Right now he was so far away from being the kazekage that he could possibly get but Kankuro didn't seem to care in the least.

"Let's sit down for a while… okay?"

A nod was felt against his chest and the puppet master kneeled down and took Gaara with him as he did, keeping him close to him so they kept hugging when they sat down behind the protecting cliff where no one could see them.

"Just let it out Gaara… just let everything out, I'm here with you"

He repeated, wanting to make sure his baby brother really understood that he wasn't going to leave him or think less of him because he was crying and showing emotion in the open. As suspected, Kankuro had understood that Gaara did indeed let out feelings when he was alone, but never around people to keep the cold hard shell around him that he was known for but now it seemed he could barely keep himself together around anyone instead, including himself and Temari. He had never seen him cry though, only training furiously when something was bothering him, that was however another kind of release of feelings.

"There now… you're not alone, I'm here and I'm not leaving..."

Kankuro repeated and rocked his baby brother while he cried; sitting with crossed legs and Gaara in front of him with his legs to Kankuro's right somewhat over Kankuro's leg and his arms wrapping around his big brother, clenching his black suna shirt on the back. The puppet master was softly hoping that his little words of support and reassurance would help the redhead trust him more. So far Kankuro was the only person that had gotten this close to him since Gaara was six and had killed his uncle Yashamaru and that was ten years ago now. To be honest he could only thank Uzumaki Naruto for that, if it hadn't been for that chuunin exam and the fight in the forest outside of Konoha Gaara would never have gotten a new view of life and would have remained cold, emotionless and killing to feel alive.

"why…"

A soft, broken mumble that caused the puppet master to hold his brother even closer than before.

"Because I'm your brother and I love you, I would never give up on you... ever."

"…love?"

The word was muffled by his shirt but seafoam colored eyes soon looked up at him, questioning him while another tear fell from the corner of Gaara's left eye. The sight just caused Kankuro to want to kiss him. He looked so vulnerable, so broken so… so lost. A gloved hand with free fingertips let the thumb trace over the tear, wiping it off while they gazed into each other's eyes with only a few inches apart.

"Yes… love."

"Why love..?"

"Because that is what you do with people you care so deeply for that you could give your life for them without even hesitating once"

"Y-… you would do that… for me?"

"Yes, I would. Without even blinking"

A soft sob was heard soon followed with a sigh before Gaara leaned back to rest his forehead by Kankuro's left shoulder, moving his arms to his chest instead of around his brother but gripping the front of his shirt. The puppet master kissed the top of Gaara's head while letting his right hand run through the red hair, his left hand wrapping around the lithe back of the body that was his brother.

"I don't understand love… but I need it, I know that now…"

A pause as the wind softly ran its caress over them.

"Uzumaki Naruto told me that… a-and … I don't want to be alone anymore. The silence is so deafening!"

A pale hand came back to grip tufts of red by the left temple but a hand was there to take it away, to spare that beautiful red hair.

"You're not alone. I told you. I'm here with you... I'm not leaving. Maybe someday you get use to the silence or it gets filled with something else."

"…you promise?"

Seafoam colored eyes searched deep, dark ones for the answer. At that instant Kankuro really saw how hungry Gaara was to be loved, to love and to feel he was something more but the tool of violence their father had hoped he'd be.

"I promise"

He couldn't help it. They were so close, it was just about an inch between their lips and all of a sudden he had leaned down and their lips met before he even knew it. Gaara gasped through his nose and instantly closed his eyes. The kiss was brief but it was still there and it made the redhead pause in his panicked state, his body seemed to relax a bit by lips softly touching.

Kankuro closed his eyes as well, it felt like he was in a dream, this couldn't be real! He was kissing his brother straight on the lips and he didn't protest? A soft whimper from Gaara that sounded like a choked sob caused the puppet master to break the kiss and looked down at Gaara before he bit his lower lip.

"I…I'm sorry… I shouldn't have done that…"

"why?... I-Isn't this what people do… when… when they….. love…?"

Gaara's black rimmed eyes looked up at him again and Kankuro swallowed.

"umh… well, yes… They do but.. we're brothers it doesn't really apply to us. We probably shouldn't tell anyone about this either, especially not Temari…"

"Why?"

"Because we share a blood bond… it's wrong."

He found himself quite embarrassed now but Kankuro also felt the need to answer Gaara's questions when he asked and answer them truthfully.

"Why?... I- I need this… Kankuro.. I…"

Gaara's words trailed off and he closed his eyes again before lowering his head, still leaning the side of it on his brother's shoulder.

"I'm not sure Gaara…Maybe you have someone else you love that could let you have this? People would look at us very badly if they saw anything like this…our branches are too close to each other on the kinship tree I was talking about a week ago, you remember?"

Gaara nodded quietly before he turned his head towards his brother's chest again, letting his left hand grip his shirt by his face to try and hide it in the fabric.

"No, there is no one else…"

He paused and another tear made its way down his cheek before he hid his face partly in Kankuro's shirt again, he swallowed before he spoke again.

So… society denies me this too..? This… this… 'Love'… Society damns me no matter what I do…"

"oh… Gaara…"

Kankuro wrapped his arms tighter around his baby brother, wishing that he could somehow help his brother but as far as he knew, his brother had never even been with anyone in anything that could even begin to be called a romantic relationship. To be honest he had never even seen Gaara kiss anyone either. Had Kankuro just given Gaara his first kiss? It had never even dawned on him that that could be the case. Horrified he bit his lip at the thought but continued to rock his brother in his arms as if nothing was wrong, all while his shirt got stained with warm, salty tears.

"ssh ssh... there now... I'm here..."

[center]…tbc…[/center]

Page 6 of 6


	7. The difference between care and pity VII

Chapter VII

Another week had passed and nothing had happened. Gaara had asked if he could get his work home and who was Kankuro to deny the kazekage to work from home? His baby brother had asked him with one of those 'please don't deny me this' looks in the doorway of his room. Kankuro had of course wanted him to only rest but at the same time he understood that Gaara wanted to do more than not do anything at all so he had agreed. He didn't take all of the papers of course, only the ones that were the most critical to be signed and Gaara didn't seem to mind.

"Kankuro… did you hear what I just said?"

"eh? What? … no, sorry. I was daydreaming"

"or dreaming is more like it… you've been like this since two days ago! It's almost impossible to talk to you… get a grip!"

"Sorry Temari… I'm just trying to figure out ways on how to help Gaara, it kind of occupies my mind."

"I know the feeling, otouto… but like you said, I think we should leave him be for a while."

"mh… yeah…umh…he'll get around to it soon, I'm sure"

"I hope so too… Hopefully he's better when I return again"

Kankuro blinked and looked confused. Had he forgotten something again?

"eh... return?"

"..Kankruo! … I'm leaving for a month to spend time with Shikamaru and his family. We're going to camp and see their hunting grounds and meet the deers and all! It's been planned for months!"

"Ah... right, that was today…"

Temari gave him a sisterly death glare only she could deliver, Kankuro returning it with a charming younger brother smile that said 'you know you love me anyway', causing Temari to shake her head at him with a sigh.

"When are you leaving?"

"In a few minutes. I'm just packing my last things now, and I wanted to say good bye to Gaara too before I go"

"Ah…"

come to think of it, Temari idid/i have her traveling gear on, what was he…. Sleeping? Truth be told, his mind had been occupied since two nights ago, in other words… the night when he had kissed his brother on the lips before saying he was sorry that he did so, when in truth he wasn't. He had wanted to do that for a long time just to know how the redhead's lips felt against his, if they were soft or raspy like sand – They had been soft. His eyes had been longing for touch, for the love his heart craved so badly. Kankuro had slowly begun to understand what Gaara meant about the 'deafening silence' during the day he had spent thinking about it. He had been thinking about it constantly, trying to sort the puzzle out.

"Kankuro! HellOoo?"

"eh? Oh sorry… um… come again?"

"I said… is Gaara in his room still or where is he?"

"ah… eeh.. I'm not sure, last I saw him he was.."

Temari nodded and walked out of the kitchen where their conversation had taken place and headed towards Gaara's room which was out in the hallway and to the left. They had chosen to share a kitchen even though they had smaller kitchen in their apartments too. Gaara of course had nothing at all in his fridge and Temari was sure the kitchen was completely unused too.

She knocked on the door and she heard a muffled 'leave' from inside.

"Gaara? It's me, Temari… I just wanted to say good bye before I leave. I'll be gone for a month…"

Silence. Then… she thought she heard movement inside and not too long after, the door clicked before the knob was slowly turned and Gaara appeared in the doorway to his apartment. He looked worn and tired where he stood, looking Temari in the eyes with a tired look.

"Have a safe journey."

He said quietly, meant in all honesty but the attempt of closing the door right after was stopped by his sister's hand on the door.

"Gaara… please."

"Nh…?"

"eh… Just… take care and for god's sake.. ieat/i properly. Okay?"

"I'm not a child…"

"I know you're not... but I still care"

"and I don't need pity…"

"It's not pity… it's icare/i. Ask Kankuro to explain that to you. I don't really have time right now, I'm leaving in a few."

"nh…"

"I just wanted to say good bye, like I said."

"Good bye, Temari"

She swallowed a deep sigh and instead gave him a warm sisterly smile and a light hand on his shoulder for a second or two. He looked up at her with emotionless seafoam colored eyes but with a touch of care and that was enough for his sister to be satisfied.

"Like I said, take care Gaara."

She resisted the urge of wanting to lean forward and kiss his forehead like she had done when they were younger and Gaara a mere toddler. The kazekage closed the door again and everything fell silent in the hallway again. Kankuro had listened in somewhat from the hallway to the kitchen but he simply couldn't help himself. He loved his baby brother and he loved Temari but he was also very protecting of them both and currently very much so over Gaara since he wasn't really mentally stable.

Kankuro came out and greeted Temari in the hallway as if he just came around the corner and followed her to the door with a light smile on his lips, placing his arm around her shoulders while they walked the few meters that was left to the front door down the hall.

"You better take care now neesan… and you better be safe or I'll kick Shikamaru's ass"

"Like you could even if you tried, otouto.."

She said with a grin then hugged him as he returned the favor, kissing her cheek in a sign of brotherly affection.

"Yeah… probably right, but I could still try! I can't help he's good at planning ten steps ahead when I'm good at going with the flow!"

They both chuckled a bit before she turned and left with a warm smile and wished her safe journey. Kankuro turned back inside and finished the dishes since breakfast while his thoughts once again came back to Gaara and how he had reacted on the light kiss he had given him on the lips. He had been so needy of touch, craving it like the air he breathed, who was Kankuro to deny his baby brother what he needed? This was truly a fight with himself. To go with his heart, or to go by the rules set by society?

Just as he finished the last plate he heard light footsteps coming towards the kitchen and he knew it was Gaara just by hearing them and not only for the fact they were the only ones inside at the moment. When the footsteps stopped, Kankuro turned around to see Gaara stand by the doorframe, half hidden by it while glancing at him with his seafoam colored eyes.

"Hi otouto"

"Oniisan.."

"mh?"

"… that.. coffee… could I have some of it?"

"Of course, Temari taught me how to do it, it will take a few minutes to get ready though"

Kankuro smiled lightly towards his brother while he seemed to think about something.

"Can I watch?"

"You want to watch me prepare the coffee?"

Gaara didn't reply but the look in his eyes when he once again met Kankuro's eyes said he wanted to and the puppet master waved his brother into the kitchen.

"Come on, I'll show you."

He said and picked the coffee brewer out from one of the cabinets while Gaara stepped up beside him as he plugged the machine into the wall then stretching to get the coffee and filter.

"Here's what you do. "

Kankuro glanced to his right at Gaara who leaned in a bit closer beside him to see what he was doing.

"You open this lid here, put the filter in like this"

He said, doing it while he explained.

"Then you take the pot and fill it with water and pour it in here and stop at the amount of cups you want to brew"

They went over it properly, Kankuro showed how to work the machine and how many spoons of coffee you put in depending on how much water you had and where the water line showed on the brewer. The turned it on by flicking a small red button on the side and the water instantly started to gurgle and be pushed up into the machine and dropping its way down the coffee in the filter then turning brown while it dropped down into the pot.

Gaara watched the event, fascinated of what he saw. This was not at all like you made tea. The concept was the same yet, different. Kankuro watched his baby brother with warm, dark eyes, admiring his looks. His pale skin, his soft features and unusual eyes, not to talk about his dark red hair; Where ever that had come from he wasn't sure but there was obviously some kind of gene somewhere in the family. Their mother had brown hair, their father had dirty blonde so it wasn't from them Gaara had gotten his fiery hair. Suddenly Gaara looked up at him, meeting his gaze full force and caused Kankuro to choke a hitch.

"Is it ready now?"

"uh.."

Kankuro looked at the brewer which gurgled in the lack of water in the machine, all of it now in the pot and was called coffee.

"Yes… it's done. Click the red button again so it sets on 0 then take the pot away and throw the filter with the coffee in the bin."

Gaara did so while Kankuro picked out two cups, enjoying the company of his brother even though he didn't say much. At the same time, Gaara had never been much of a talker.

"I'd like to drink it in my apartment"

Gaara said, Kankuro paused for a moment, hesitating before he asked.

"may I join you?"

Gaara looked up at his brother and thought about it for a moment before he nodded with his usual 'nh' as an answer, placing the pot on a tray, Kankuro placing the cups there as well. He turned around and opened the fridge and took a plate of buns out and placed it on the tray as well in the hopes that Gaara would eat something since he had refused breakfast today. Gaara frowned and looked up at his brother with questioning eyes.

"You usually eat something with coffee, buns or bread or some form of cake."

"nh…"

Gaara seemed to accept the answer before he started walking towards his room, expecting Kankuro to take the tray which he also did. He was making tremendous steps forward with his brother right now and it seemed that the young kazekage was a little more relaxed when they were the only ones here and Temari had gone out. Perhaps Gaara would tell him one of these days but, for now they would concentrate on drinking coffee and eat buns, Kankuro hopefully getting to actually isee/i his brother eat for once.

Page 5 of 5


	8. We shouldn't IIX

CHAPTER IIX

The brothers ended up sitting on Gaara's bed with the tray between them. It wasn't too unusual that Gaara ate in bed since he didn't really sleep there anyway he usually had his meals there if he could chose where to eat, and who was daring enough to tell the kazekage he couldn't eat where he wanted to anyway?

They spoke about different things during a few hours, well… Kankuro did most of the talking but Gaara seemed to listen and gave his short comments here and there where he found it needed but it did feel peaceful and calm, nothing was strained between them despite the fact that Kankuro watched Gaara when he actually did eat two buns to the coffee they had made together while he himself only had one.

For the first time in a long time, they both fell silent and just watched the rest of their coffee in their cups and that's when Gaara asked a question he had been asked to by Temari earlier.

"…Kankuro… what is the difference between care and pity?

"huh?"

"Temari asked me to ask you…"

"oh… umh… well…"

How on earth would he explain this in a good way so Gaara understood? He scratched the back of his head trying to come up with something good.

"umh… well, it's like… mh.. Pity is like, you care because you feel sorry for someone and wants to do something for them to make them feel better, a kind of 'pampering' but emotionally while Care you do out of your own heart because you care for that person and wants to make sure they feel well and feel safe as well as at peace."

Gaara looked at him and frowned somewhat, making Kankuro sigh a little before he started over again while he put his cold coffee down on the tray between them.

".. Imagine… a puppy.."

"A puppy?"

"yes… you know, a small dog, puppy."

Gaara arched a brow as Kankuro began to explain again.

"Imagine you see a small puppy on the street, right. And… it's all dirty and neglected and looks abandoned by everybody. Now… if your heart went out to that puppy and you felt pity for this little dog. You'd take care of it and pamper it as if wanting to make up to the rough time it's had before it met you…"

Gaara listened while focusing his seafoam colored eyes right into Kankuro's, making him somewhat distracted.

"eh… ahem… well, if you feel care for it. You take it home and treat it as any other dog but give it love and tend to its well being but don't overdo it to an extent of wanting to smolder it with treats, blankets, toys etcetera because if you did that, it would once again end up as pity."

"nh.."

Gaara looked down at the cold coffee still in his hand in the cup Kankuro had chosen from the cabinet in the kitchen.

"Then… you care… but Temari pities me…"

He mumbled before he took a drink of the cold coffee, causing Kankuro to choke a mine of disgust. Cold coffee wasn't something you really liked even though Gaara seemed to like it.

"Is that how you feel, Gaara?"

"nh?"

"That Temari pities you but I don't?"

"Yes"

"Why? … what's different about how we treat you?"

Gaara shifted a bit and frowned, seemingly to search for the answer while his cup went down to the tray as well. Kankuro took the chance to take the tray away and place it on the nightstand before moving back up on the bed, ending up a bit closer to his brother than he had before.

"nh… she seems to want me feel better by doing things for me all the time… give me things, make sure I eat and tries to make conversation with me when I'm not interested in having one… She tries too hard to show she's around to help…"

He mumbled, looking down at the maroon colored bedspread with small suna signs on in dark beige. Kankuro tilted his head and watched his brother while the young man yet again furrowed a non-existent eyebrow.

"But you… you let me have my space when I want it, you don't talk to me to make me talk about things I don't want to talk about and I know you're there if I need something without you telling me so."

Kankuro just stared at his brother for a moment while he fought his jaw to not drop to the bed and shatter in little pieces of shock. Had Gaara just told him… he, he liked his attention better than Temari's? Was there a compliment in there? He blinked.

"ah… eh, well yes. Of course I'm here if you need me, Gaara. That's something you should never even doubt, not even for a split second."

Gaara looked into Kankuro's eyes for a moment and Kankuro couldn't really read the look he got from his baby brother.

"Did you mean what you said two nights ago, onii-san?"

"Yes… every single bit of it, otouto."

"Then…wh--"

Gaara looked away and swallowed before closing his eyes for a moment, pulling his knees up towards his chest, wrapping his arms around his legs and lowered his head somewhat while looking to his right,, away from his brother. Kankuro frowned and watched the change in his brother. He had seemed so at peace today when he came out and asked for coffee, now he looked troubled and pained.

"Then?"

"Then… why do you deny me what you know I…nh…"

"Need?"

Gaara looked away even further and looked at a small pad on the floor that seemed to have fallen from one of his pockets of the black suna shirt hanging by the wardrobe. He didn't reply to Kankuro's question of 'need'. Sabaku no Gaara didn't need anything and he had been out of it two days ago when he said he did. Gaara didn't need, Gaara was strong and independent, Gaara was the kazekage.

"Gaara…Otouto, hey…"

The redhead closed his eyes and leaned his left cheek on his knees as he heard Kankuro move closer. His name had been spoken so softly. Arms wrapped around the redhead and he was tilted towards his brother's warm strong body, forehead to shoulder.

Kankuro knew he took a great risk just by touching his brother without his consent but he still wanted to make a try and see if he'd let him. A soft whimpering sigh was heard before Gaara slowly unwrapped his arms from his legs and wrapped them around his brother instead.

"I shouldn't, Gaara… we're brothers…"

"I don't care about the damned society and its fucking rules!... since when was [i]I[/i] a part of society anyway!?"

Kankuro was a bit startled, he hadn't prepared for Gaara's outburst against his shoulder but moments after it was growled out, he instantly felt his brother tremble as he grasped Kankuro's black suna shirt by his chest with his left hand and his back with the right. They once again sat hip against hip on Gaara's bed just like they had done the first time Gaara had broken down while dreaming and here they were again, his baby brother once again crying by the way his body shook and trembled.

"ssh ssh… there now. I'm here for you because I am your brother and because I care. I won't leave, ever."

Soft sobs were heard and muffled by Kankuro's shirt while he ran his right hand over the back of Gaara's head, the left once again making soft circles over Gaara's back while soothing him the best he could.

"Kankuro… please… take the pain away…"

The words were so soft, yet so full of pain and the eyes that looked up at him broke his heart all together, so pleading, so broken and lost. Red, puffy and dark rimmed as they were, it didn't take long for more tears to fall even though Gaara was fighting to control his hitched inhales.

Kankuro looked at him with a concerned look right into his eyes and felt something give away inside just before he closed his eyes for a moment and swallowed. ' I'm crazy' he thought before he leaned down and caught Gaara's lips with his own, causing Gaara to hitch a breath through his nose while meeting his brother's kiss on his pale lips.

Soft moving hands made their way to Gaara's cheeks, cupping them gently while they kissed, filling the redhead with something he didn't know how to lable. Kankuro partly opened his mouth and traced his tongue over Gaara's lower lip and the unconscious reaction was that Gaara immediately opened his, allowing access to the tongue that gently teased his own.

It didn't take too long until the redhead figured out what to do with the visiting tongue while Kankuro guided him through the deepening kiss. His heart had begun to beat faster and the hands that gripped his older brother's shirt tightened their grip more, wanting more…needing more!

Gaara tasted so much better than he'd thought if you didn't mind the coffee taste but it was what was behind that taste that was special, Gaara's own personal taste. It was a mix between honey and spices while he himself smelled like sand and sun kissed skin and a bit of sandalwood. Kankuro shivered by the swirling touches of his baby brother's tongue against his own and fanned out a warm breath over Gaara's cheek.

Kankuro suddenly felt his body start to react to the kiss and realizing he was slowly awakening in his lower parts. He slowly broke the kiss before it would become too obvious that he really did have an erection but thankfully the black shirt he had on was rather long and covered his private parts with an extra layer of clothing over his pants.

"Gaara…"

His brother made a soft whimper of the lack of contact but soon opened his eyes to look at Kankuro, questioning why he broke the kiss he longed for so badly. Gaara's body was lightly trembling and his body had reacted in a way he had never experienced before but by the way he was sitting with his knees pulled up, it didn't show.

"Gaara… we shouldn't do this… it's not right…"

"I decide what's right or wrong…"

"Otouto.. please, it doesn't work that way… not in these cases…"

"Leave…"

"Gaara..?"

"Leave."

The seafoam colored eyes looked away again, the hurt look on his brother's face was almost unbearable but Kankuro did as asked and rose from the bed but not without placing a warm hand on Gaara's left shoulder as if telling him he'd still be there when he needed him.

With a heavy sigh he took the tray from the nightstand but left the buns on the plate and walked out, glancing over to Gaara just as he crawled up in fetal position with his back to the door.

Kankuro closed the door and remained on the other side of it for a while, leaning at it while fighting a mental war against himself as well as his sporting erection. He needed a shower so he could take his time to jack off. The thought of Gaara's kiss only made him stir even more in his pants and was now more than semi hard as he walked to the kitchen to leave the tray, then directly to the shower.

Page 5 of 5


	9. Realizations IX

CHAPTER IX

It didn't take long for Kankuro to undress and get into the hot shower and as soon as he had closed the shower door he grabbed his length while the water drenched his suntanned body. He closed his eyes and cursed under his breath but didn't move his hand right away, just holding his erection.

"shit shit shit…"

He mumbled to himself. This was Gaara's doing, Gaara did this to him! Turning him on like this with his innocent mind that didn't understand what was wrong or right in the eyes of society and wouldn't accept getting a lesson about how people thought about brothers being together, incest at its peak.

But, his brother's tongue against his, teasing his senses, tasting so good in his mouth while seeking so desperately for body contact and need of love which he pretended he didn't want. Kankuro groaned quietly to himself and leaned his left hand on the shower wall and started to stroke himself up and down in slow motions and let out a light moan.

"nh… fuck…"

He whispered and upped the pace, tracing his thumb over his slit, teasing himself while he wacked off to the memory of the needing kiss of his brother, the taste and the feel of his skin. His balls moved with the motion of his hand while slowly tightening as his pulse increased as well as his breathings while his thoughts slowly changed. From remembering the taste of Gaara's kiss, to imagining his little brother on his knees sucking him off while playing with his balls like a good boy would. The thought itself made Kankuro moan and upped the pace even more, tracing his thumb over his now glistening head while the tension in his lower region started to build.

"oh God… nh…!"

He whispered, his hips starting to move into his own hand to meet his yanks and thrusts, imagining Gaara sucking him harder, faster and allowing him to do him in the mouth, coming in his mouth and watch him swallow his load. He felt his balls tightening, pulling up against his shaft as the tightening of his groin intensified tenfold before he released himself with a shaky moan, spraying the shower wall white while milking himself until the last drop.

Kankuro leaned his head on his lower arm that now rested against the shower wall, still holding his length that slowly relaxed in his grip.

"What the hell am I doing…?"

He mumbled and shook his head.

"fuck…"

Kankuro was just glad that Temari indeed had gone away for a month or she would have witnessed a very weird spectacle with Kankuro spending time with his little brother in his apartment, only to end up walking out with the tray and with a boner to go. How ironic.

He collected himself then started to clean up, washing his hair and body while trying to force the new thoughts and dreams out of his head.

[center]~¤~[/center]

Gaara heard the door close behind him and felt Kankuro lingering outside for a moment before he left. Why was his brother denying giving him what he needed? So what if society didn't look upon them with kind eyes, no one had ever looked at Gaara with kind eyes so nothing would change there. Another thought occurred to him though. Kankuro had always been watched by the city as one of the most outstanding puppeteer and a great ninja, perhaps it was Kankuro that was afraid to lose face? That the citizens would look at him differently?

He still rested in the fetal position as he corrected himself between his legs when he realized things were… different… down there. He looked down and saw a bulge and blinked. It took a moment before he touched it, realizing that it indeed was his own penis that had become hard and it was more sensitive now than it had ever been!

Gaara opened the edge of his pants while sitting up, opening his underwear up as well to look at his swollen shaft. It looked different but yet the same. He touched the tip and gasped lightly while pulling his pants down a bit more to release the pressure of his shaft while looking at it. This had never happened before but he understood he had some kind of need to want to do something with it, the question was what? He could call Kankuro in here again but that wouldn't help the point of actually making him walk out. Gaara removed his shirt to be able to see better and pulled his pants down to the middle of his thighs.

He touched the tip again and traced his fingertips over it and exhaled softly again and realized his nipples had become hard by the touch of his penis however that worked? He gripped the shaft with his right hand, it was so warm and it made him want to touch the tip again, perhaps he could do that all over if he moved his hand up and down to make the foreskin move as well? After all, that had fallen back to reveal his sensitive tip to begin with.

He tried it, he pulled up then pushed down again and a kind of pleasure swept over him. He tried again and the same feeling appeared again, a form of itching pleasure in his length that made him want to keep rubbing himself up and down which he also did while realizing his heart increased the pace and he became slightly winded after a while.

"nh..!"

A strange feeling of tension slowly formed in his lower region while he pumped his hard shaft and suddenly a small white pearl appeared on the tip which caused him to stop for a moment before touching it with his left hand. It was sticky and he could easily smear it out on his sensitive tip and by doing so the sensitivity increased even more than before. He moaned quietly before moving his left index to his mouth to taste the fluid. It was salt, tasted good and he wanted more. Salt and sour things were something he liked eating when it came to treats if he could choose.

Gaara started to pump himself again, the wetness of his tip teasing even more now when the foreskin could actually glide over it. His penis bobbed a bit and he looked down again, realizing that more pearls had appeared on the tip, running down the side and down to the edge where it was picked up by the foreskin and yet again smeared over his head.

"…nh..!"

His left hand's index once again stroked over the liquid to taste more of it just before he felt the need to increase the pace, something told him to and something also told him he could have more of that fluid if he went with it. Then the thought of having Kankuro's hands on his shaft like this appeared in his head, that he could just lay back and enjoy the feeling while it built up in him.

Gaara leaned back on his pillows in a half sitting position and increased the pace even more and felt his balls tighten a bit, were they supposed to do that? It didn't matter. The feeling increased and he wanted more of it, needed more of it!

By now he was panting and arching his back while his hips started to move on their own to work his hand. His entire body tensed and he found it hard to breathe in a steady pace just as the pressure couldn't build more, it felt like he exploded inside and looked down on his shaft at the same second while panting. Hundreds of a second and he released himself all over his chest as well as hitting his open mouth with some of it as well, swallowing it as a reaction to it.

He shuddered and looked at his chest while his shaft was still pumping small amounts of seed onto his stomach, bobbing a bit up and down by each release. He breathed hard then slowly scooped up a bit of his seed and tasted it again. It still tasted salt but it was good and somehow he felt a bit calmer after his 'milk' had been let out.

"Kankuro… can you get milk too?"

He mumbled to himself, licking his fingers.

What none of the brothers knew was that they had released at the same time thinking about each other but in different parts of the house.

…tbc…

Page 1 of 1


	10. Stay with me X

CHAPTER X

Another two days had passed and Gaara had once again refused to eat or even let Kankuro in, trays were left outside his apartment door but untouched several hours later. Kankuro had started to worry a great deal and this time he didn't have Temari to consult either.

He had tried to call out to his baby brother several times already through the door but the answer was always the same "Leave" that was of course, if it was an answer to begin with. Kankuro kept working in the village and as soon as he got home, he went to check on the tray. Two days in a row finding it untouched.

The puppet master had just come home again, this time at a very late hour since he worked until past midnight before the watch was switched so he could go home and sleep.

Kankuro walked past Gaara's room to get to his own when he heard a whimper and instantly stopped and backed towards his brother's door and listened and was careful not to touch the tray. The whimper was there again along with a mumbling 'no'. He was dreaming again… bad dreams to go with it. He sighed and leaned his head against the door only to realize the door was somewhat open and clicked when he leaned on it and revealed a part of the dark room inside.

"Gaara?"

No answer. Kankuro looked down at the tray to step over it when he realized that one of the toasts and half the cup of coffee had disappeared. That meant that Gaara had at least eaten something today and that in itself was a relief even though the whimper and movement inside once again returned him to reality.

"Gaara... are you okay?"

He carefully went inside and pushed the door closed behind him to avoid letting light in over Gaara's form on the bed. The redhead whimpered again and thrashed around in his bed and it seemed he had completely entangled himself in his cover once Kankuro came closer. It would have been a very sweet look for his brother if it hadn't been for the panic written all over his face. Kankuro gently leaned down and touched Gaara's left shoulder with his right hand and shook him carefully.

"Gaara, wake up... you're dreaming again"

He said but nothing happened except for even more thrashing and panic.

"Gaara… Gaara! Hey… otouto"

He placed a hand over Gaara's cheek to see if he would react but the reaction wasn't what he had hoped since Gaara reacted as if he had been hit hard in the face just before he gripped Kankuro's upper arm in a vice grip at the same time he woke up in panic, panting for air while a bewildered look met Kankuro's worried ones while pearls of sweat covered his entire body and forehead, how long had he been going at this nightmare before Kankuro got there?

"Oniisan..!"

He gulped before he threw himself in his arms, clinging to him for dear life as good as he could while being tangled in his cover.

"ssh ssh… easy Gaara, it's just a bad dream."

He hushed softly and took his hood off and tossed it beside the bed on the floor with his right hand while wrapping his left arm around his brother who yet again broke down no matter if he wanted it or not.

"There… easy… I'm here now"

"nh…"

"sssh… just calm down, I'm here…"

They sat still hip against hip for a good while, Kankuro gently rocking Gaara and helping him untangle while leaning his left cheek on top of his head and once again running soft circles along his back to calm him down. It seemed that it helped a bit faster now than what it had before, or it was possibly the fact that Gaara had begun trusting him a bit more.

"…O…Oniisan…?"

"mh?"

"could…nh… could you… stay here… tonight?"

"Sleep here?"

There was a lack of response but a slight nod against his shoulder while the pale face was kept hidden.

"I… I suppose I can sleep in the armchair if you want me to?"

"No.. I mean… here, beside me… keep me saf-.. away… from the dreams..."

Gaara mumbled while inhaling Kankuro's personal scent which was currently a mix of sand and sweat from working a long shift in the sun then staying awake half the night before his shift was over and some part even wood, probably from the doll making.

"mh… tell you what, I really need a shower first and I think you do too. If you shower, I'll do so as well and then I'll make sure you're safe for the rest of the night…. Deal?"

Gaara glanced up at him and contemplated the answer a moment before he nodded with a slight sigh. He didn't really want to let go of Kankuro at all at the moment but if that was the terms of him staying there, he would agree to them like the politician he had become at the mere age of 16.

"Okay… so, you go shower now and so will I."

"nh… ok…"

Kankuro rose from the bed but kissed Gaara on the top of his head before he did, earning a quirk of a brow from Gaara before he moved to stand as well just before he took his night shirt off and now standing in only his tight black boxers along with a strained and pained face to go with it.

"I'll be quick…"

"nh…"

Kankuro left and nearly stumbled on the tray outside the door but managed to step over it in the last second then pushed it aside towards the wall instead of in the middle of the entrance. He headed into his own apartment and took a quick shower, re-dressed in night clothes which was boxers and a somewhat tight sleeveless black shirt and returned to Gaara's apartment again only five minutes later.

He knocked on the door but didn't get an answer so he stepped in and heard the shower still running. Kankuro looked around and found the wardrobe in the dark and walked over to it, opened the doors and flicked the light inside, realizing that Gaara had everything in there, placed by color and size when it came to towels, sheets and the likes.

"wow…"

He mumbled to himself and grabbed a sand colored sheet , pillow cases in maroon and a new blanket in the same color and walked back to the bed and re-made it. Gaara came back from his shower just when he placed the last pillow onto the bed and looked up at his brother.

"I figured it would be more pleasant to sleep in a new changed bed than in soaked sheets"

Gaara looked at him then nodded slightly.

"Arigato"

"You feel a bit better now?"

"… a bit.."

"Good. Now… Are you sure you want me to sleep here with you? I can sleep in the armchair or on the floor on a mattr—"

"I'm sure"

"…..oh…o-ok…"

"well… umh… let's dive in then?"

"nh…"

Gaara walked up to the right side of the bed, Kankuro walking to the left and crawled into the bed, Gaara ending up on his left side only dressed in white boxers while Kankuro had a shirt with it. This younger brother was indeed a sight from the Gods themselves but he worked hard to shove those thoughts deep into his mind for now. It would be quite embarrassing if he'd end up with a boner while sleeping beside his brother now wouldn't it? He tried to focus on something else.

"What was the bad dream about this time?"

"….the same.."

"oh… no change then?

"I saw your death too this time…"

"mh… well, it's just a dream otouto… don't worry about it"

"nh..."

Gaara crawled in under the covers and snuck in closer to his brother, surprising his older brother while doing so. He cuddled up on his Shoulder without looking Kankuro in the eyes or even asking if it was ok. The puppeteer looked down at his younger sibling and it only took a moment before his arm had wrapped around Gaara's form and allowing him to rest his head on his shoulder better.

"Everything is fine now, Gaara… I'm here with you"

"nh… arigato…"

"you're welcome. Just don't come at me with the sand okay? I don't need more scrubbing, I'm clean and dandy..!"

"hnh…I won't"

Was that a slight grin on Gaara's lips? If it was, it was very welcomed even though it was a brief smile. Kankuro tried to stay awake but it was quite hard when he had worked so many long shifts this week but he fought it the best he could and the award came with Gaara's breaths evening out and becoming deeper and longer as sleep took him.

Kankuro couldn't help but look down on his sleeping brother, he looked like a red haired angel in his arms, head resting against his shoulder and his right arm just by Kankuro's heart, the other arm somewhat wrapped around Gaara's own chest.

"Sleep tight, otouto…"

He whispered and took the liberty of kissing his brother's damp hair again but this time also inhaling his scent, to let it fill his nose and let himself remember it until later. Gaara indeed smelled like sandalwood and sand and even more so after the shower. Perhaps he even showered in something that smelled like sandalwood? Or maybe… it was simply, a part of him. Kankuro had other problems however and that was the fact he was becoming somewhat awakened down south by the knowledge of having Gaara so close and the body warmth was welcomed since nights in Suna was anything but warm, quite the opposite. Cold, damp and chilly to the bone.  
He fell asleep thinking about these questions and having his little problem while his nose was still nuzzled against his brothers damp red strands and Gaara cuddling close to him as if trying to feel safe. After all, that was what he was going to imply that he wanted even though he managed to change it to 'keep the nightmares away'.

…tbc…

Page 4 of 4


	11. You say you love me XI

CHAPTER XI

Kankuro woke up suddenly, at first not registering where he was or why he woke up the way he did until he realized he was in Gaara's room. That was right, his little brother asked him to sleep in his room so he'd keep the nightmares away.

Now, someone would think it wasn't that special with a request like that but knowing Gaara's past and how hard he let people in and trusted them, that was a huge request to fall from his lips and who would deny him what he dared to ask for no matter if it was in a weak moment he asked it? At night and during these past weeks, Gaara had not been the Kazekage of Suna, nor had he been his usual cold self and since Temari left he had started to actually open up more and more.

In other words, for Gaara to ask Kankuro to spend the night to keep him away from the dreams, or… as he actually meant 'to keep him safe' from the dreams, was a huge request that the puppet master never ever thought he'd hear from his brother's lips.

Gaara whimpered and thrashed around in the bed beside him, hitting him in the ribs with his elbow a few times before he realized it was his little brother who woke him up with his whimpers. Kankuro instantly leaned over to him hushing him while trying to control the movements of flailing arms.

"ssh ssh, easy Gaara… calm down.. you're safe, I'm here otouto… sssh…"

"ngh!...mph…. no!...pl…ce…. Not him! NO!"

Gaara woke up with panic in his eyes and was met with Kankuro's dark eyes watching him at the same moment he wrapped his arms around him, pulling Gaara close and placed his head by the slope of his neck.

"sssh…ssh… I'm here otouto…"

"ngh…"

Gaara eased into the embrace and rolled up closer, both his arms by Kankuro's chest and somewhat hiding his face while trying to will the tears away. If Kankuro didn't know better he'd guess that all the bottled up tears and hurt were pouring out of his brother during these days. Ever since Shukaku was removed from him and his brother returned to life, Gaara had acted differently all and all. It almost seemed like he was learning to feel and understand feelings and he was getting a crash course in it too. Not to mention learning how to keep dreams and reality apart.

"Gomen…"

"Nh? What do you apologize for Gaara?"

He asked softly, feeling a hitched sob against his chest.

"… everything…"

"Otouto… you have nothing to apologize for…"

"I do… so much, I've done so much damage…"

"Well… technically.. it wasn't you, it was shukaku.. but he's not in you anymore. You're free from that now.."

"But I'm not! He's haunting me all the time! He's putting images in my head, freezing me where I stand and forces me to watch horrid things… he makes me watch when he massacres people, tear them apart so slow you can see the panic in their eyes while being eaten alive!"

"ssh ssh calm down, otouto… breathe. Sssh…you're safe now, I'm here."

"ngh..!"

Gaara had almost panicked there and that was nothing he was used to seeing at all. Heck, he couldn't even remember one single time where Gaara had raised his voice in fear, only in violence and blood thirst which was completely gone even though he still had control over the sand.

Once the redhead calmed down a bit more, Kankuro spoke up again, once he felt his brother relax a little even though he was still tense in his arms.

"See this as a test of will. Shukaku is testing to see if he still has power over you even now when he's not inside of you. Prove him wrong, prove him you're stronger and change the images he shows you. [b]you[/b] have control over your own mind, Gaara [i]No one else[/i]. Since when do you let anyone get on your back, demon or no?"

"nh… I don't know….. I… I just feel so… drained. Like all my chakra was stolen from me…"

"Well, if that's how you feel, otouto… then borrow some of mine."

"nh?"

Gaara tilted his head up to look at his brother with a frown.

"It means.. let [i]me[/i] be strong for you when you're not strong enough. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I'm here to lend it to you. If you need advice, I'm here to give it to you if you want to listen, if you need protection, I will do anything in my power to keep you safe from harm."

"nh…"

"……… that's what siblings do, they protect each other because they love each other."

Gaara blinked and didn't reply at once, then inhaled and hesitated a moment.

"… love..?"

"Yes, Gaara. Love."

"You… you say you... [i]love[/i]… [b]me[/b]?"

Kankuro swallowed. It wasn't really what he had meant… he thought. Or was it? His heart skipped a beat at the question and the look in Gaara's eyes made him hold his breath and swallow. At the same time he felt his lower regions react. 'no no! No! how humiliating!' He thought and closed his eyes for a moment. That moment was enough for Gaara to sigh and lower his head before he tried to get out of Kankuro's embrace.

"let me go."

He demanded and began to struggle but Kankuro held him tighter, resulting in a low feral growl from Gaara's side while pressing his palms against his brother's chest to try and get away.

"You don't love me; it's just something people say to hurt others!"

He hissed and Kankuro closed his eyes tightly.

"no... that's not true"

"It IS!"

"[b].Go![/b]"

It wasn't a secret that Gaara wasn't really physically strong and Kankuro who was nearly twice Gaara's size had no trouble holding him. It wasn't until he heard the sand that he panicked and opened his eyes and stared into furious seafoam colored eyes, he had to think fast if he wasn't going to end up in a sand burial or worse. He swallowed again then put his lips against his brother's just as he felt the sand wrap over his chest to choke him like a snake chokes its pray.

Gaara froze, as did the sand and Kankuro closed his eyes with a throbbing heart in his chest and a semi erect penis in his boxers. Just what the hell was he doing anyway? As Gaara seemed to relax in his frozen state, so did the sand and it simply slid off him and landed on the floor on Kankuro's side of the bed. He gave himself permission to open one of his eyes a little to see if Gaara was watching or not but he had his eyes closed.

This was his chance to make him calm down completely like he did a few days ago. Kankuro gently traced his tongue over Gaara's lower lip and just as last time, the reaction was a mouth that slightly opened to allow the visiting tongue entrance.

Kankuro enhanced the kiss and this time Gaara's tongue was there to meet his when he entered his little brother's mouth. It was soft and warm and a light taste of mint, probably from the toothpaste just like his own probably tasted like spearmint.

Gaara slightly exhaled a breath over Kankuro's cheek while his arms stopped struggling all together and instead eased into the embrace even more before he somewhat sucked Kankuro's tongue into his mouth. That went straight to his groin and his shaft bobbed somewhat and became a little more than semi erect. He was just about to break the kiss and come up with a good excuse for them not to do this when he felt something poke his abdomen… wait… Gaara had an erection… too?

Kankuro moved a little and realized his now hard shaft had poked Gaara's thigh and in turn, the redhead broke the kiss and looked downwards. The covers had been tossed away since a good while back by all the fighting so it was easy to see they both were hard. Gaara blinked while looking between his arms since his hands and lower arms still rested on Kankuro's chest.

"… yours does that too…"

"nh..?"

The younger brother looked up and met a embarrassed look of his older brother.

" Do you… get milk too?"

"Milk?"

Kankuro blinked and realized just how innocent Gaara was in this kind of situation and blushed.

"Oh… eh… It's not really… 'milk' …Gaara. It's… umh… semen…"

"I know it's not real milk… but it tastes good, it's salt. Does yours taste salt too?"

"Ngh!?"

"I tasted mine two days ago when it did… this…I'm not really… sure how… though.."

Gaara confessed and Kankuro cleared his throat and thanked the heavens for the darkness around them or it would have been very, very embarrassing even though they could see each other's faces but the small light in the kitchen didn't really do much to light up the room more than giving it a night light.

The redhead silenced himself when he realized he probably said something out of line and glanced down at his brother's chest with an embarrassed look that just made Kankuro smile and melt. He embraced his brother warmly again but this time somewhat letting their erections grind together while moving closer, making Gaara slightly moan because of it.

"So… what you're saying is that you've never had a boner before?"

"…boner?"

"Yeah.. you know… having it hard like a rock, stand up, doing salute.. having an erection."

"oh….nh….no, not before two days ago…"

"Really?"

"nh… am I not normal..?"

"oh.. tch… you're sixteen Gaara… this is when everything happens."

"So…nh… what…. What do I.. [i]do[/i] with it… I mean… I..uh…"

He fell silent again and gave a shy look to his brother when he glanced up at him from under his red strands.

"I can tell you.. or show you…"

Kankuro whispered, feeling his need aching in his shaft the longer this conversation went on.

"…show me."

"You sure?"

"Nh…"

"Okay…"

Page 1 of 1


	12. First time XII

Chapter XII

"Gaara...umh..."

"nh?"

"How much do you know about birds and the bees?"

"hn… birds chirp bees hum…"

"ah heh… eh… no no… I mean…birds and bees as in… sex"

"oh… I've read books... about men and women but… they were for children…pictures but no real text to read…"

Kankuro smiled and ran a hand over his brother's left cheek with his right hand before he kissed his little brother on the lips again then he explained a little better about how gay sex worked. Strangely enough Gaara didn't seem the least frightened or disgusted, in turn only making Kankuro ache even more down stairs.

"You want to try that..?"

"nh.."

"y…you sure?... with me?"

"I don't trust anybody else, Kankuro…"

"o..okay…"

Kankuro didn't even know why he kept asking if Gaara was sure, most probably it was his own insecurity to step over that line and [i]be[/i] with his brother, at the same time he couldn't deny the fact that he had fantasized about it several times already during the last two weeks.

Gaara suddenly took things in his own hands and leaned in, kissing his brother on the lips and for now taking charge by visiting his brother's mouth while mimicking the way Kankuro had done to make him open his lips by tracing his tongue over the lower lip. The puppet master made a light mewl and pulled Gaara closer and their erections once again traced against each other inside their underwear but it didn't really stop Kankuro's length to bob in anticipation while Gaara's grew a little more in size and strained in his white boxers.

Kankuro moved his fingers a little and strings of chakra opened Gaara's Y-front to let his shaft out, his own had already snuck out by him moving his hips. The redhead inhaled a bit surprised but allowed it to happen while they kissed deeply, letting their tongues dance and twirl in a growing passion.

Gaara realized his heart had picked up pace again and a form of tingling anticipation was lingering in his body and a lot more than it had when he had found himself hard for the first time. Kankuro slowly traced his brother's left arm, down his waist and thigh before he turned back up again. Fingers traced and gently squeezed balls still inside the underwear before they came up to trace Gaara's length.

It wasn't as thick as his own, but it was a bit longer. At the same time it fitted Gaara's body size and form the way it was. Gaara gasped and broke the kiss and looked shocked at first while the hand traced his length with knowledge on how to tease. It didn't take long until his eyes glazed over and his breath trembled just as his body did. He swallowed just before Kankuro took their lengths' together in the same hand, stroking them against each other, teasing both of them. They moaned at the same time and Kankuro whispered to his brother.

"We should take out underwear off… it's easier that way."

"Nh…"

Gaara seemed pretty out of it but at the same time he really did appear to be a lot more relaxed now than what Kankuro had ever seen him before and that was a good thing. The redhead started to fumble with his underwear and his brother wasn't slow to follow. Black and white boxers fell to the floor and instantly they were in each other's arms again, kissing and touching.

Legs entangled and mouths teased and taunted while pulses rose higher and breaths became more passionate by each gentle trace of fingers. It took a while but Gaara's hand soon found his brother's length and traced it, touching and remembering the feel of it as well as his scrotum. It earned a moan and arching of Kankuro's back before a hand came down to Gaara's length as well, both young men stroking each other.

"do you have any oil?"

Kankuro whispered, Gaara shook his head.

"no"

"ok… we'll solve it anyway.."

He whispered and took Gaara's hand and guided it to hold both lengths in his hand, Kankuro's hand leading the movements by holding his brother's hand but this time Gaara shuddered and lightly arched his back.

"Lay on your back"

"nh?"

"Trust me"

He kissed his brother again and Gaara allowed the puppet master to turn him to his back while following to prop himself up on his lower arm beside him, kissing his little brother deeply while taking command on the teasing by pumping Gaara's length softly with his right hand. A good amount of precum soon appeared like glistening pearls and he made sure to smear them out on his brother's swollen head.

Gaara moaned and arched his back a bit more while his shallow breaths had become deep and slow. The beautiful seafoam colored eyes were closed and lost in the sensation of actually having a dream coming true; his brother touching him down there where it was so sensitive.

Pale fingers snaked around Kankuro's form as Gaara's right hand snuck in between his arm and his side where he half sat close to him. The redhead snuggled his nose into his brother's shoulder and moaned softly again while his left hand softly traced Kankuro's chest and coming across his nipple which instantly budded out with a soft gasp from his side.

Gaara opened his eyes and glanced up at Kankuro still with a glazed look then grinned and moved closer to the other nipple and flicked his tongue over it while gently pinching the other one. He wasn't stupid and anything that could get a moan out of someone he would remember.

"oh… Kami…"

"nnh…"

Kankuro moaned quietly just before Gaara's left hand left his right nipple and his hand traced down to his length. He mimicked his brother's movements while feeling him up and remembering his size and form while still teasing with both hand and tongue.

"You're bigger than I am…"

"Nnh… Gaara that doesn't matter…"

"it doesn't?"

"N-noh… everybody's different… just like girls..a-and… breasts… they're.. all different tooh…"

Gaara let out a soft moan again with the trace of Kankuro's thumb over his slit and arched a bit as his hips moved towards his brother's hand and the pleasing feeling he gave.

"Nh... bh… breasts… just lumps of flesh… no special... about them… different sizes..or not…Nnh!"

Kankuro had gripped Gaara's length tighter and pumped him a bit faster once he heard Gaara had no interest at all when it came to girls or their breasts, causing his brother to moan. Could it be that his brother was in fact gay without even knowing or understanding it?

"F…faster…"

Gaara whispered and cuddled closer to his brother who kept him lying on his back on the bed. Kankuro could see his brother's balls pulling up and twitching by each stroke and did what he was asked to do, knowing he was close to release. The redhead lost his pace on his brother's length when his body started to react by his hips thrusting into Kankuro's hand, his breaths becoming faster and shallower.

"K-Kankuro….i…it's…its…"

"sssh… relax, let yourself fall into it.."

"nh..!"

Gaara pulled his left leg up somewhat while his entire body tensed up. He found it hard to breathe and the hand that had been holding Kankuro's erection came to rest around his brother's neck all while the tension built rapidly in his lower regions.

"Stay on your back.."

"Nh!"

The pleasure almost became too much but all of a sudden when Kankuro upped the pace even more, while Gaara was made made to stay on his back, he exploded with a hitched gasp and several moans along with his body's spasms while his shaft still in Kankuro's hand pumped his seed all over his stomach while he clung to his brother's neck as good as he could from laying on his back. Kankuro's length leaked precum by now and the site of Gaara coming by his hand alone was better than any of the dreams he'd had in the last week.

"Nh…Kami…kami….."

Gaara whispered and as soon as his shaft had stopped pumping he felt Kankuro's hand trace over the warm wetness on his chest, collecting it.

"Spread your legs a little…"

"nh…"

Page 4 of 4


	13. Crossing the line XIIV

CHAPTER XIII

Gaara did as his brother asked while he was still in a daze from the best orgasm he'd had in the amount of two. It was no secret that Kankuro obviously knew what he was doing so he must have practiced this act of masturbating at least a few times more than Gaara had but on the other hand, he was three years older too.

"Just… try to relax, okay?"

"nh…"

The redhead closed his eyes and suddenly felt his brother's finger by his entrance, circling it teasingly and in turn earning a few contractions since Gaara was still so fresh from pumping his seed onto his own stomach and the light teasing touch teased his senses. Once the contractions eased up, Kankuro took the chance of gently squeezing a finger inside and more contractions once again started at the same time Gaara moaned and clenched somewhat, tilting his head towards Kankuro's shoulder he was still laying by.

It felt somewhat embarrassing to have someone's finger up their behind but at the same time it felt more weird than unpleasant and he soon got used to the feeling and it even began to feel good. That's when the second finger was added, smeared with his own cum which had been collected from his stomach so graciously by his brother's right hand. The same hand that was now scissoring him while teasing, moving in and out.

"nh..!"

"You okay?"

"nh…"

"Just... relax and it will feel better"

Gaara nodded and focused on relaxing and after a while and after a third finger was added, he actually began to like the feeling even more and welcomed it. All of a sudden a jolt of the same feeling he'd had just before he came, rushed through his body and he hitched a gasp and opened his eyes in surprise, looking at his brother with questioning eyes while trying to catch his breath.

"That… was the prostate. A bundle of joyful nerves"

"nh..!"

Gaara grunted and swallowed while he closed his eyes again.

"..I…I want more…"

He whispered, clearly feeling a bit high again.

"Just a little while longer, I don't want to hurt you."

"nh"

Kankuro mused; he loved seeing his brother this way and knowing that he was responsible for it only made it more exiting. After a few more minutes of preparing, he gently pulled his fingers out and took a bit more of Gaara's cum and smeared it on his own hard length as well as some of his own pre-cum from the bed sheets.

"I think you're ready for me now… just, remember to relax okay.."

He said softly. Gaara nodded again then looked up at his brother when he shifted around him to position himself between his legs and in turn pulling them up so Gaara's feet was against the bed. Kankuro looked up at the redhead and placed his hard shaft just by Gaara's entrance and made soft thrusting motions against it. The entrance convulsed directly but he took it as an advantage and pushed in inch by inch each time it opened up for him and as soon as it clenched, he stopped. It didn't take too long to fill his brother to the hilt then he waited and let Gaara get used to his size.

"How do you feel… does it hurt?"

Gaara thought for a moment or two.

"…full… and no… it doesn't."

"Okay, that's good. It might sting a little at first… I'll start moving now, okay?"

"nh…"

He nodded and slowly wrapped his arms around Kankuro's neck, he in turn wrapped his arms around Gaara's sides and ending up with his hands on his shoulders from behind, snug between the sheets and Gaara's back.

He was gentle, moving out then in again and kept watching Gaara's facial expressions that he actually did have! It was quite addictive to watch them too, and the way he tilted his head back a little by each mewl of pleasure by the feeling [i]he[/i], Kankuro could give his brother. He leaned down and placed his lips against Gaara's and increased the pace a little once he felt his brother relaxing more around him.

"nnh!"

The redhead moaned through his nose while having his lips and mouth occupied by his brother. The feeling of having someone moving in and out of you was weird but the feeling was becoming better and better and suddenly that bundle of nerves was hit again and Gaara arched his back and gripped Kankuro's shoulders with blunt fingernails tracing his sunkissed skin while he realized his shaft was beginning to awaken again even though he had climaxed only minutes earlier.

Kankuro closed his eyes and let out a moan when he hit the prostate, Gaara clenched him just right when he did that and his warm insides were so tight already but he just couldn't have enough now. He wanted and needed more. Just when he was about to open his mouth to make a suggestion, Gaara did it on his own and pulled his legs up and wrapped them around his brother's waist, allowing Kankuro to access him better.

"oh…kami… Gaara…"

"more…"

The whispers of both brothers were like a soft breeze through hot sand to each other's ears. Kankuro increased the pace a bit more but yet not going fast, then he pushed in a bit deeper and harder and that did the trick to make Gaara moan again then took his left hand and moved his fingers to one of Gaara's nipples, pinching and teasing it. The exhale of Gaara's pleasure was intoxicating to hear since his brother rarely made a sound and only spoke in a monotone voice. He was so much different now.

Gaara's breaths had become deep and slow and his arms wrapped around Kankuro's neck tightly and somewhat forcing his brother down to his neck, somewhat squeezing his hand in between them but he could still gently roll the hard nub between his fingers, and it made Gaara shudder. He of course wasn't slow that he nipped the skin in the slope of his neck while thrusting into him, only moving his hips since Gaara basically had him pinned with arms and legs wrapped around him.

The feeling of Kankuro's nipping on his neck and the full feeling he had inside and the pinching of nipple, not to mention his erection being rubbed against two fit bellies caused total bliss in Gaara's mind, he could barely think and the only sound he managed to get out of him now, were small light moans by each thrust of his brother's shaft. The slight pleasurable pain from his nipple went straight down to his groin in some weird way, the nipping on his neck made him shudder in want of more.

Soon he found the rhythm and followed Kankuro's movements with his hips, allowing him to go even deeper and also get a different angle inside of him which caused Kankuro to moan and grunt in pleasure this time.

"…hah….ngh…"

Okay, brain wasn't working and definitely not speech either. His eyes were only half open when Gaara turned his head a bit and got hold of Kankuro's earlobe, nibbling it and licking it, earning another grunt and warm breath over his moistened neck where his brother's tongue and teeth had been only moments earlier.

Kankuro had begun to breathe harder and Gaara wasn't slow to do the same once the pressure began to build inside for the both of them. The redhead was moaning by each thrust and did so right into Kankuro's ear, allowing him to hear the awakening passion within his brother and that was a trigger on its own to keep doing what he did.

Kankuro's right hand slid away from Gaara's shoulder and traced it way down to his hip where he gripped it, feeling the movements his brother was following while moaning in his ear. The tension inside of him told him he wouldn't last so much longer and especially not while hearing the moaning in his ear.

"f..fh…f-fa..ster…dh…nh…de-ep..er..."

Gaara managed to whisper out somewhat winded and unwrapped his legs from around his brother but pushed them upwards so they were aligned along his sides with his brother in between, completely opening himself up to him, trusting him.

Kankuro raised his head up a little and looked at his little brother's face while thrusting faster and deeper just as requested. He was amazed, Gaara had a soft touch of pink on his cheeks and he was actually a bit sweaty in the hairline, just as himself. The seafoam colored eyes were closed but a complete look of pure passion and…[i]feeling[/i] rested on his face, causing Kankuro's jaw to drop a bit but never once did he loose the pace, quite the opposite he upped the pace even more and earned a hitched moan from his brother. The only thing he forgot was the now neglected nipple.

He rose up on his hands with straight arms, pulling his legs up a bit so his knees rested by Gaara's hips while he thrusted in faster from this angle. Gaara's arms gripped his lower arms with his hands, his upper arms still resting on the bed even when he arched his back for a moment when Kankuro once again hit his prostate, causing him to let out a loud moan while his balls began to move towards his shaft, slowly signaling he was getting closer to release.

"I…I…ngh…K…Ka….nnnh..!!"

"ssh… I know… me too! Just…l-let go…let….nh… let it …come.."

Kankuro thrusted in as hard as fast as he could and felt his balls pull up, he took his right hand and moved it to Gaara's length and pumped it quickly with his pace of thrusting when he felt he couldn't hold back any longer. Then he arched back just before he let out a loud shuddering moan, soon followed by Gaara's whimpering moan of complete bliss as well.

Gaara felt his brother release himself inside of him with a hitched breath, pumping his seed into his system. The redhead arched his back and stopped breathing for a moment and made a mine of a silent scream, tearing at his brother's arms with his hands while he himself clenched around him over and over while his own orgasm spurted out over Kankuro's hand, his own chest and chin, not until then did he manage to hitch a breath again and get air into his system. They both panted loudly while trying to regain control. Gaara slowly opened his eyes and gazed at his brother with passion written all over his face while panting, then… it happened. Sabaku no Gaara…. Smiled. No, he actually [i]glowed[/i] [b]while[/b] smiling.

Kankuro sat dumbfounded while his shaft pumped out the last of him while Gaara's convulsions milked him to the limit. The redhead yanked his arms away from the bed and made his brother fall onto his chest where he was pulled into a warm honest hug. Kankuro didn't really mind the stickiness on their chests but once it started to dry, it was quite the hassle to get rid of since it tended to flake.

Gaara pulled his brother close and kissed his lips lightly then his cheek before he pulled closer to his ear and whispered in a husky tone.

"…arigato…Kankuro."

The puppet master blinked and it took a second or two before he wrapped his arms around his baby brother as he too smiled and kissed his brother's cheek, returning the whisper.

"you're welcome, Gaara…"

"hnnh…"

There it was again, a smile. How strange it was to see his brother smile, Kankuro couldn't remember his brother smiling at all… not since… since he was six and before that even. His flaccid organ slipped out of Gaara's entrance and he in turn mewled at the loss at Kankuro's inner amusement.

"Why won't we get cleaned up eh?"

"….nh… too tired…"

"Well… let me clean you up then… at least a little."

"nh…"

Gaara closed his eyes again and slowly began to drift off even though he fought the sleep that wanted to claim him, mostly from habit but if he'd been clear headed at all, he probably would have worried about the dreams as well but those thought's didn't even exist at the moment.

He felt his brother lean down to reach something on the floor and some kind of cloth soon dried Gaara's chest off and when the redhead glanced up to see what it was he realized it was Kankuro's hood he had forgotten in his room a while ago that Gaara hadn't even touched even though it was placed on the floor by the bed for three days.

"… Your hood."

"ah… don't worry about it. I'll wash it later. You rest Gaara."

"nh…"

The redhead closed his eyes again and allowed his older brother to clean him up. Kankuro was amazed that Gaara actually allowed it but he wouldn't question him if he let him, not a chance. Kankuro thought for a moment if he should clean his brother down stairs as well and decided to test him to see how far he was allowed to go. He began cleaning his member first and Gaara didn't react so he made his way lower and lower but found himself being allowed to move freely and the sand still laying on the floor on his side of the bed didn't move a corn even, so Kankuro kept cleaning his brother up.

The redhead felt his brother hesitating here and there when he moved lower but he didn't mind. If Kankuro could be this gentle with him despite what Gaara could do to him and yet dare to be with him like this, teach him and allow him to feel the way he had done just now, still in the afterglow of his third orgasm ever he could do some cleaning up too.

He felt the cloth moving lower but didn't mind at all if Kankuro was there with his chosen hood for a cloth when he had done a lot more there a few moments ago and once he was done, Kankuro cleaned himself up and crawled up beside him on the bed and just laid there watching Gaara's features until the redhead tilted his head towards him still with eyes closed but with a peaceful look on his face. He took his features in, his straight narrow nose, his thin pink lips he had been kissing, and the high but softly rounded cheekbones that still held a soft rosy touch against the pale skin from their act. The dark areas around his eyes were a beautiful contrast to his skin and hair really. Without even opening his eyes, Gaara spoke lazily.

"you're staring…"

"eh..wha… ermh… well… uh… nh…..yeah… guess I was…"

Kankuro blushed somewhat and cleared his throat even though he didn't need to and glanced down, only to realize his eyes had fallen on Gaara's now flaccid organ instead.

"why?"

"umh…"

He looked up at his brother's face again, eyes were still closed.

"well….umh… It's not really common to see you so peaceful, Gaara… your frown is gone and replaced with a light smile, and that makes you..eh…umh… b…beautiful…"

How lame was that? Kankuro kicked himself mentally and pulled his legs up somewhat where he lay on his left side right somewhat cradled his chest and the left hand under the pillow he was resting his head on. Gaara was still resting on his back and had not moved since he'd had his orgasm. He found himself staring into clear seafoam colored eyes once again and swallowed hard and bit his lip, did he just go too far?

"…beautiful?"

"uh…yeah… y-y'know… yeah…"

"No one's told me that before…"

"…really?"

"nh…"

Gaara closed his eyes again and once again left Kankuro staring only this time it was in slight shock. How much was his brother really lacking in the signs of love? Had no one really told him he was beautiful or even wanted to bed him before he came along during his entire life of.. 16? None at all, ever? He shivered at the thought which Gaara picked up on and guessed he was cold. He rolled lazily to his right side and snuggled up against Kankuro while calling his sand to move from the floor.

At first Kankuro froze hearing it move but then realized that Gaara was simply getting the covers for them and pulled it over their forms before moving the sand to the gourd again where it rightfully belonged.

"… even though I am the kazekage… no one really cares about me… no one wants me… they're afraid of me… no one can love a monster…"

Gaara mumbled against Kankuro's shoulder sleepily just after his brother had wrapped his arms around him and allowing him to rest there. He himself let his chin, mouth and nose end up in Gaara's hair, inhaling him slightly while sleep was beginning to claim him.

"I care and I want you… I… I love you…you're not a monster…"

"……nh…"

Gaara's breathes evened out and Kankuro pulled the cover up tighter around them and sighed slightly. He really [i]did[/i] love his brother, didn't he? Now he just had to figure out exactly [i]how[/i] he loved him. That was an enigma in itself.

"sweet dreams, otouto…"

Page 2 of 2


	14. Denial XIV

CHAPTER 14

Kankuro had awakened quite early the next morning and once he realized he was still in Gaara's bed, the anxiety had struck him of what he had done. He'd now been making breakfast for two hours and made both laundry and dishes twice but it still didn't stop his mind from bashing himself. What man in his own sane world had sex with his little brother!

"Fuck!"

He cursed again and started over with the laundry once more and stuffed the machine full of sheets, pillow cases and other bed stuff and flicked the machine on. How could he ever look Gaara in the eyes again once the guy realized what he'd done? Kankuro had to say he was sorry and ask Gaara never to tell and to forget what happened, this was a mistake and a big one at that.

Breakfast, yes, breakfast's good. Must make more breakfast.

Gaara slowly turned around in bed and rolled over onto the other pillow next to him. It was cold and someone was missing. Had everything been a dream last night? Or was it real? He opened his eyes slowly and looked around in the dim room without moving. The rays of the sun outside made a small streak of light through the curtains and revealed that the room was a bit dustier than it usually appeared since the dust particles in the air showed with ease in the ray of sunlight.

He turned around again and slowly sat up with a slight groan when he felt the soreness in his behind. No, what happened last night must have been real, not to mention that Kankuro's hood was still on the floor, only in another location and with white stains on it but if the pain wasn't proof enough, the hood was.

"nh…"

Gaara rubbed his morning hair that stood on all ends and moved to sit on the edge of the bed. The cover moved with him but not enough to cover his naked body that'd had its first sexual experience only hours before. What time was it anyway? He blinked a few times and looked around and located a wrist watch Temari had given him on a birthday, a gift he'd never really worn and usually forgot on the night stand.

Lunch. It was lunch time, at least if you were Gaara and usually didn't sleep at all. 10 am. Gaara turned and looked at the pillow that still had the shape of Kankuro's head on it then turned towards the closed door and wondered if his brother was home at all or not since everything was so quiet.

Gaara stretched a little then rose and allowed the sheets to fall free from his body before he walked towards his drawer and picked out some new underwear and clothing before he went to the shower to freshen up. Memories from the night before playing in his head, mostly the conversation that had occurred before the actual act had happened. Kankuro had been a bit on the nervous side but Gaara didn't really understand why. If two people liked each other and made the other feel good, why would it not be allowed? He kept on pondering this while he dried his hair with the towel from the rack, then put the clothes on and headed out of his room.

What met him was the sweet smell of freshly baked scones, pancakes and a slight smell of coffee in there somewhere as well. A light frown appeared on his face while he followed the smell, hearing Kankuro moving around somewhere close by but not yet in view. Could Kankuro even bake? Approaching the kitchen he saw his brother move from the laundry room to the kitchen again and it made Gaara tilt his head while he silently made his way there, his stomach rumbling due to the smell of food that he hadn't quite eaten in several days of laying on his bed doing nothing while his siblings worried about him.

Gaara looked around the doorway to see Kankuro taking plates from the already made dishes just to re-wash them again which made him wonder why he cleaned plates that were already clean as well as he wondered why Kankuro seemed to be so round up about something.

Then, his eyes fell on the table. Pankakes for an entire party, baked scones for an army, Coffee to keep said army up for at least three days, cookies that Gaara had never even seen Temari bake. The list went on and Gaara's unseen surprise with it.

"Are we expecting company I do not know of?"

Gaara asked, earning a yelp from Kankuro who hadn't noticed that Gaara was even standing there. He turned around with a haunted look fumbling for words with an embarrassed look on his face.

"aah…eh.. Hey..umh.. Gaara! Eh..n-no… no company heh.. just felt… uh… no reason…just.. wanted to bake.."

Yeah, real swell Kankuro, a warrior that's a guy, playing with puppets wanting to bake freely like a housewife, for no reason? Like Gaara'd buy that. In turn, Gaara looked very suspicious to what Kankuro said then looked at the over-made table, made his usual "hn" then went to the coffee pot and poured himself a cup before he walked to the table and sat down on his usual spot, pulled the chair out and sat down the way he usually did. He took a drink from the cup then looked up at Kankuro who hadn't moved from the spot he was at by the already made dishes, still staring at his little brother.

"Are you going to join me?"

"oh.. oh, sure heh.."

Kankuro looked a bit embarrassed again with that fake smile of his and Gaara frowned at it while he took a piece of scones from one of the plates and took a bite from it. Why was Kankuro behaving so strangely? Then it hit him, it must have been what they had done last night. He finished chewing and just as Kankuro sat down he looked straight at him.

"Kankuro, did you not like what we did last night?"

"wh…eh.. no.. uh.. I mean, yes.. yes! I did.. but… umh… we…hm.. well, we shouldn't have…uh… done it…"

"Why not?"

Kankuro sighed.

"Because… I told you Gaara, we're brothers… brothers shouldn't do that… not with each other."

"Says who?"

"…the law."

"I am the law, Kankuro"

Gaara watched his brother squirm when he clearly didn't manage to explain things to his little brother the right way.

"I mean… society frowns upon it, it's not right for two siblings to share the same bed as we did last night"

"But.. you helped me"

Gaara stated and took another drink of the coffee in front of him then another bite of scones while Kankuro seemed to think that the table was quite interesting to look at and it seemed one specific spot must be very dirty since he kept rubbing his sleeve on it over and over.

"You may see it like that, and I might see it like that… but Gaara… it's wrong…"

Kankuro slowly looked up to meet his brother's eyes with his own pain filled ones.

"Gaara… what we did was incest, it's wrong on all the worst places…"

"But, we both wanted to, how can it be wrong then?"

The Kazekage asked and tilted his head somewhat to the left while studying Kankuro and his stressed behavior that not even the cat would be able to miss if they'd had one.

"It's not like that Gaara…"

"Then, you didn't like it. You didn't like being with me."

Gaara stated and put what was left of the scones down on the plate again from holding it while he spoke, looked at Kankuro with one of those looks that struck you right in the heart when you saw he shut himself down emotionally, then rose from the table.

"Gaara, Gaara wait! It's not like that! Wait!"

"hn… you lie."

The Kazekage left his brother alone in the kitchen and exactly where he went, Kankuro wasn't sure of since he ended up with his elbows on the table and his hands covering his eyes and forehead as he sighed deeply. How was it that he managed to finally get so close to Gaara, and then fell right off the grid again?

"God damn it all!"

Kankuro cursed himself then tossed the towel he had been drying the plates with on the table. The boys remained on different parts of the house for the rest of the day even though Kankuro wasn't even sure that Gaara was in the house more than the fact he could sense his chackra at least being close by.

When the night fell and Kankuro had been in agony ever since breakfast even during his shift, his co-workers had of course wondered what was going on since he seemed unusually quiet but he had just waved it off as a head ache. When he came home again the food on the table was still untouched, no one had been there to open the bags or plastic covers that kept it fresh and with that, Kankuro sighed. So they were back to not eating again were they?

He took some muffins he'd made earlier and made some tea and placed it all on a tray after leaving his scrolls in his room. No need to have his puppets with him now when he wasn't working and he was certainly not going to use them on Gaara. Kankuro walked with the tray to brother's room only to find the door slightly open but out of respect he knocked on it before he gently pushed it open just to see the most stunning sight he'd ever seen before.

Gaara sat in the open window looking at the moon while a soft breeze were playing with his hair and allowed his clothes to occasionally tighten over his chest when it flew by. He swallowed and began to slowly walk inside even when Gaara didn't make a sound or a movement to acknowledge his approach.

"Gaara… you need to eat."

A snort in return and a sideway glance before those beautiful light green eyes returned to the nearly full moon outside. Kankuro sighed and walked up to the desk beside his brother and placed the tray there and took a muffin from the plate and held it up towards Gaara.

"You need to eat, brother."

"You don't need to feed me, I'm not a child."

"I know you're not, but if you don't eat your stomach will hurt eventually…"

"Fits well with my chest then"

Kankuro sighed and placed the muffin on the plate again and looked at his brother with eyes filled of pain while the agony inside hurt like hell and he knew he deserved every bit of it too. He leaned on the wall to be able to face Gaara a bit better and let his left hand hold his right elbow in a movement of insecurity.

"Look, Gaara… I didn't mean to hurt you this morning.."

"But you did."

Gaara said with a cold calm voice.

"I know, I know… and... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, it's just… If someone would find out what we did…"

"If that is what you are afraid of, no one needs to know."

Kankuro found himself staring at Gaara who was staring at the moon. Was he just implying he wanted this again? That he was ok with this? Was he implying that they would have a secret incest relationship? Kankuro's mind raced and the confusion and agony rose like a wave of water ready to hit the chore once it got high enough, crushing what was left of Kankuro's sanity.

"uh.. umh… well, what if someone sees us? Even walls have eyes Gaara… This is wrong in so many ways no matter what hearts feel."

With this, Gaara turned to look at him with eyes that were examining him very closely.

"You say your heart feels? Does it feel good things? … because my heart is in pain."

A deep red strand of hair fell into Gaara's face from the wind just as he returned to look at the moon and shut his feelings down as good as he could. Kankuro's heart melted even though he tried to make it un-melted again but didn't quite succeed. He slowly reached for the strand of hair.

"Gaara…"

"Don't. Not unless you mean it."

Kankuro stopped in his motion when Gaara turned his face away from him and he sighed and let his hand fall again. What did he mean by his actions? At the same time he did realize that Gaara didn't stop him with the sand like he usually did, just by his words and that was bad enough.

1


	15. Dismissed XV

Kankuro had left Gaaras room after he was "dismissed" the way he had been, and took a shower to try and sort his thoughts out even though he had ended up masturbating to the memories of Gaara underneath him, the feel of being inside of him and his sounds and smells. He had gone to bed even though he couldn't really sleep that night and had ended up touching himself once more while thinking of Gaara again.

It was a long time ago he had such a hard time relaxing because of a raging mind and that of course lead to a lot of twists and turns in his bed while he was trying to sort them out without being overly horny on his little brother. What did he want? And most of all, what was he prepared to do to get it. Gaara was obviously willing, that much was clear, but was Kankuro willing to risk everything? Not only himself, but Gaara's seat as Kazekage as well. Something he was Sure Gaara hadn't quite understood yet.

Gaara remained in the window for a few more hours, watching the moon making its course over the desert sky of Suna. Once again his heart was full of pain just like it had been when he opened up to his uncle Yashamaru so many years ago. And now here was Kankuro, giving him pain as well even though it was a completely different one. On the other hand, pain was at least something to feel, right?

Suddenly, something wet appeared on his hand which he held by his chest and he looked down on it in surprise. Water? No, a tear. Gaara found himself looking at it as if it was a foreign object for a moment, raising his hand to look at the drop resting there before it trickled its way down his hand. The other hand reached for his cheek as if he wanted to check if it was from him the tear came from and it was.

When was the last time he had been crying out of heart ache like this? Nightmares and frustration sure he'd cried to himself then, but when had the world felt so heavy and dark as it did now? … When he was six. His uncle, that had been the last time he'd cried out of heart ache, that was also the day when he'd shut his emotions down again. The thoughts kept returning to that moment when Yashamaru had tried to kill him, the only person he had allowed himself to give trust because he seemed loving and caring. Was Kankuro doing the same? Was he making Gaara open up just to hurt him more? Perhaps kill him when he least expected it? The questions were many but the options to ask them were few.

Eventually, Gaara crawled into bed after undressing until he only had his underwear on. His bed still had Kankuro's scent still, on the extra pillow as well as on the covers which made him sigh in his own sadness of being alone, the sadness he didn't want to accept was there even though he knew he couldn't really deny it. Gaara pulled the covers up to his waist then pulled Kankuro's pillow closer to him.

"Why am I always denied love..?"

Gaara asked quietly while his hand ran over the empty pillow his nose was inhaling the scent from. What was he to believe and what was he to think? None of this made any sense. One day you get what you need and the other you're denied because of what other people may think? Gaara rolled up in fetal position and eventually fell asleep holding Kankuro's pillow. Even though it was a restless sleep with a lot of dreams which Kankuro could hear due to Gaara's whimpers but he didn't go there to soothe his baby brother, not tonight.

Kankuro didn't go there for the other three nights either, even though the dreams seemed to continue night after night. His heart ached for his little brother every time he heard his whimpers and half screams but he wasn't sure if he was ready to say what he felt or what he wanted or even if it was the right thing to do to begin with. The boys spent three days, four days, almost a week apart. Gaara in his room; barely eating more than a fly but at least drinking a bit more than he ate once the food was placed outside his door. Kankuro took care of the household and doing his rounds while worrying about his brother.

When a week had passed and Gaara still had refused to talk to him, Kankuro was out of his mind. He was back on square one which he had hoped he'd never go back to and it was his own fault to blame. It was now almost four AM but he still hadn't gone to bed but instead remained watching the stars outside while sitting in Gaara's favorite armchair, why he did that he wasn't quite sure of.

Then it came. Just like so many nights before. Gaara's fussing while having nightmares about Shukaku no doubt. Kankuro listened to the sounds of his brother in dreaming-agony for a while and finally made up his mind. He couldn't let Gaara suffer like this, not anymore.

The Sand ninja rose from the armchair and made his way to his brother's room and knocked on the door but there were no answer more than a few whimpers and that was enough to make him open the door and enter with his brother's name on his lips. A soft call of concern that went unnoticed and unanswered, if you didn't count the whimpers.

"Gaara… Gaara, wake up. It's a just bad dream"

Kankuro walked up towards his brother's bed and just as he was about to touch him, he heard the sound of rustling sand but never got the chance to react more than gasping at the sound and knowing what would happen. Gaara swung around in bed with a hunted look and glistening sweat all over his lithe frame.

"Are you going to kill me now?"

He accused with a cold voice while still catching his breath from the dream. Kankuro who found himself locked in a wave of sand around his chest and arms locked behind his back, unable to move but able to speak and breathe, instantly stared at his brother in shock of what he heard.

"Wh.. what? No! Why would I..? No! Never, Gaara! Why would I want to do that!"

"You act like him, you probably think like him too… so kill me then and be done with it, but not without me defending myself."

Gaara said sharply, those cold eyes felt like they penetrated Kankuro's entire mind and being. Was this what Yashamaru had seen before he died? No one really knew since Gaara hadn't been that keen on telling anyone what had really happened. The only thing that had been changed besides Gaara's personality, was the scar on his forehead that meant "Love" in kanji.

Love.

"Gaara, no. I don't want to kill you, I would never even think the thought? Why do you even say that?"

Kankuro said with a forced calm and a soft voice, his eyes showing a little hurt of the fact that the words were even spoken. A part of him could understand why the words had been said though. He swallowed and looked down at the floor for a moment, mostly to avoid looking into those cold, emotionless but beautiful eyes of his little brother's.

"If you don't think the thought, then why do you behave like him? Are you trying to give me some form of false security?"

"No! Gaara.. please, no! Stop this… just, let me explain."

"You explained enough a week ago."

"No, I didn't. Not if this is the result of that half assed conversation we had then…"

Gaara hesitated a moment.

"You say I misunderstood you then?"

"Yes, please… stop this, otouto. Calm down. No one here is trying to harm you in any way, especially not me. Hell… I even got myself poisoned because of you a while back when I tried to chase after you when Atasuki took you, remember? Why would I want to kill you when I'd die for your safety.."

"So you say."

Gaara watched Kankuro with mistrusting eyes but eventually let the sand go and let it crawl back to the gourd again but he kept a close watch on every movement Kankuro did. Kankuro gave him a pained look because Gaara would even think this of him after what they shared. Perhaps because of what they'd shared…

Kankuro looked down the floor while he rubbed his upper arms a bit, the sand wasn't that kind to the skin even though you had clothes on, it always seemed to be able to sneak through the fibers in the fabric. At the same time, Gaara hadn't been that hard and vicious with the sand as he could be.

"Explain then"

The cold voice of Gaara rang through Kankuro's ears and It felt like it cut through every bone in his body. He swallowed hard and glanced up at his little brother and met sharp, cold eyes that would kill with a single look if they had possessed that power.

"I… I'm not sure where to begin."

"At the beginning"

"uh.. well.. yes, of course… I.. I'm just not sure where that is at the moment heh.."

Kankuro scratched the back of his head for a moment while the thoughts ran through his head. How on earth was he going to be able to explain this to a person that doesn't want to understand that what they did was wrong? He culdn't deny the fact that he had longed for it either, nor the fact that he'd been masturbating while replaying the scenes in his head over and over again. The touches, the smell, the feel; All of it.

1


	16. Explanations XVI

Kankuro had spent almost an hour trying to explain to Gaara why brothers shouldn't be together and after about forty minutes of them Gaara had actually began to relax enough to really listen to what he was trying to say and wasn't that deffencive anymore. It was reluctantly of course but it was better than nothing.

"I still will not accept your explanation, Kankuro..."

The elder of the two sighed where he sat on the floor where he'd placed himself with crossed legs a bit into the explanation that Gaara didn't want to listen to, it took too long and he was a bit too tired to even want to stand up while talking since he was off duty now.

"Why..?"

He asked tiredly.

"Because..."

Gaara turned around from looking outside the window where the sun would appear in about an hour or two when the sun rose to greet them with another day in the suna desert.

"... if it was that wrong, why did you come to me in the first place? Why did you even take those steps to go that far with me? I don't understand that, Niisama."

"umh... be- because..."

"Because?"

"...Because you're very dear to me and.. well, I don't like to see you suffer more than you already have. That and, I kind of fell into my own trap..."

"Your own.. trap?"

Kankuro blushed and looked away, fiddling with the ears of the hood he was holding in his hands. How on earth would he be able to explain this without making things worse again? Why was he always stomping himself right in the mouth as soon as he'd almost fixed things up? That was so typically him.

"Explain."

"u-umh... well... I..."

He groaned and hid his face in his hood and hands for a moment and groaned in frustration.

"...God! This is embarrassing Gaara... can't we just leave it as it is?"

"No."

"Why not!"

"Because I want to know, I want to understand, niisama."

"gnh... fine... Because I'm gay.. okay? I've known that for a while and.. well... I just happen to find redheads really attractive... and... well... you.. are... that."

By now, Kankuro had stood up from sitting on the floor and stood with his back to Gaara since he was blushing too heavily to do anything justice even though the light was quite dim in the room since the sun hadn't come up yet and Gaara had no lights on thank goodness.

"Gay?"

"Yes! Just.. leave it already! Gnh... I should leave... this isn't helping."

"What is gay?"

"I am..."

Kankuro muttered and grabbed the door handle, then realized that Gaara was asking what the word meant which in turn caused him to somewhat bang his forehead against the wall by the door and groaned. This was seriously not happening, was it? Kankuro sighed again in his own embarrassment.

"I... am gay... it means, I like other boys. Women don't attract me... I like being with boys..."

"Like... you were with me?"

"Yes..."

Was Gaara's voice much closer now? Kankuro frowned a bit and turned around slowly only to find Gaara standing about two steps away from him to his right, why hadn't he heard Gaara move? He swallowed and looked at his brother in the corner of his eyes where he stood in only his underwear in the dim light from the moon.

"Then... I am too."

"huh? What?... y-you're what?"

"Gay, like you."

"...w-what makes you... uh...s-say that?.."

Did he really want to hear the answer? He'd find out anyway of course even though he wasn't sure he wanted to or not. Kankuro's pulse had started to race in his body again and he was getting warm real quick since his mind and body seemed to have their own life and had made up their minds that he'd eventually get a boner if this kept on even if he didn't want to. He could feel the warm sensation in his groin even though he tried to ignore it. In his wildest dreams had he only wished to hear Gaara say just that, that he was gay.

"Girls don't interest me the least. I tried to understand when I heard other boys talk about girls and their breasts but... they're just lumps of flesh hanging there.. they just seem, inconvenient and in the way. I can't even imagine how it'd be to be with a girl in bed... wouldn't they be in the way there too and not only in fights?"

Kankuro stood dumbfounded for the something amount of times this night, he'd lost count to be honest. What Gaara just said was exactly what he felt only, he wouldn't put it in words like that the content was still the same.

"...and, I think I like brown haired men."

"y...you, you do?"

Kankuro slowly turned around to face his baby brother and accidentally hit the door with his foot and it clicked shut. He licked his lower lip and just stood there watching his baby brother asking himself if this was really happening or not, all while Gaara kept on talking to Kankuro's surprise.

"Like I said before niisan, I don't care about what is law or what isn't law. I am the law now and I can do what ever I like even if it would have to be in secret. I can see you want to be with me again and I know I need you. You made me feel good inside for the first time since the extracting of Shukaku... no one else has made me feel anything at all but you. Why would you deny me that?"

Gaara surprised himself by talking so much in one go but kept a straight face about it and stood still on the floor while his brother simply stared at him as if he didn't believe either his eyes or ears for some reason.

He tilted his head somewhat and looked at his older brother then took a few more steps to come close to him, so close he could feel the warmth from his body. Kankuro didn't move, not even when Gaara placed his hands on his chest to feel the ripped muscles.

"Please... if you aren't like him... then show it to me because I have a hard time understanding all of this."

"uh... h-how..?"

"Kiss me"

"But.. I...umh..."

Those eyes... They could seriously drown the entire world in a river without a single blink. Kankuro blinked again and swallowed before he leaned down and met his little brother's lips while his right hand came up to rest by Gaara's jaw and neck, just by his ear.

Kankuro didn't have it in him to fight anymore, he didn't want to fight anymore even though he knew he'd regret it in the long run. Gaara's lips on his made his heart jolt and skip a beat or two as well as his groing bobbing somewhat in anticipation and growing semi-hard. The hood he'd been holding was tossed somewhere in the room at the same time he began walking forward and in turn making Gaara back away towards the bed.

"...We seriously need to keep this a secret, no one but us can know.. not even Temari..."

"nh..."

Gaara nodded just before he sunk down on the bed with Kankuro slowly following him while getting his shoes off one by one by skill of toe.

"I have lubricant now."

Just the words he uttered made Kankuro rock hard and groaned in anticipation even though Gaara seemed oblivious to how hot he was at the moment and the words he spoke just made him even more irresistible. The Kazekage crawled up to place his head on his pillow while Kankuro got the last of his clothes off and then grabbed Gaara's underwear in one go and tossed them on the floor to reveal the entire beauty that was his little brother.

"God... I've waited for this for so long, Gaara. To feel you, to hold you... smell you again."

Gaara let out a soft whimper of pleasure when Kankuro got over him and their groins met just as their lips did at the same time. Was this real or was it a dream? He wanted to know so bad but at the same time, if it really was a dream, he didn't want to wake up, ever.

Kankuro's warm hands touched all over his body, exploring his nipples and skin and finding out just what Gaara liked. At one moment Kankuro even nipped the skin by the nape of his neck which caused him to gasp for air and let it out in a moan. That of course only earned him another nip but this time with a lick to end it.

"nh...Niisan..."

* * *

_Please feel free to review me! I live on it and it makes me want to write more! :) Give ideas of what could happen next or just comment on the chapter or the story as a whole or what ever's on your mind ^^_

_DO keep in mind tho... that this entire story is NOT beta-read since my beta-readers are mia and loa atm and have been for quite some time :'( If anyone feels the job could be for them, Do contact me, please! :)_


	17. Secrets XVII

Gaara moaned and closed his eyes. It felt so good to feel Kankuro's hands all over him again. No matter what his brother did, it just felt so good. At some point Kankuro had taken his hands up above his head and held them there with one hand while he explored his brother more with the other. That had been a complete turn on and Gaara had become rock hard in a few seconds.

"You like that?"

"nh.."

A light smile actually appeared on the kazekage's lips and the grip around his wrists tightened. Kankuro leaned down and licked the nape of his neck just before he bit down a little harder this time and earned a gasp and a moan from Gaara, the sound he could never get enough of.

His free hand explored every little bit of skin his little brother had, listening to the soft sounds and reactions he got from him. Kankuro wanted to savor this moment and drag it along for as long as he could.

Gaara arched his back and spread his legs when Kankuro bit down on his neck even harder. It was clear that a little bit of pain and a feeling of helplessness was what Gaara got off on so he kept exploring that idea. He nipped his brother's nipples a bit harder than he had before and earned a squirm and a shiver in return.

"I have an idea... just a moment"

"nh?"

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

Kankuro got off the bed for a moment but soon returned and yet again placed Gaara's hands above his head but this time he tied them together with something Gaara couldn't quite see all while Kankuro was kissing his brother's cheek and neck. The tie wasn't harder than the fact his brother could get away if he wanted to, but he had a feeling Gaara wouldn't.

"There we go... now, let me explore you before the sun rises."

Gaara smiled and squirmed in anticipation, he wanted his brother's touch, he needed his brother inside of him since that's what had made him feel good before. It however seemed that he'd need to be patient for that, and so he was, at least his brother was here and he was indeed touching him.

Kankuro started to travel down on his body, kissing and nipping all the way down, causing Gaara to shudder and only wanting more while he clenched his fists which were now tied to the bed above him. His entire body was trembling by the need Kankuro was building inside of him.

The puppet master came down between Gaara's legs only to realize his brother was so turned on he was already leaking. Kankuro's hands slowly traced Gaara's skin from his ribs all the way down to his hips and just as he reached them, he took his brother into his mouth and earned a big moan and a sigh of pleasure.

"nh...Kankuro..!"

Gaara squirmed in pleasure and wasn't sure where he'd go or what to do but to lay there with his hands tied and just feel what Kankuro did to him. He felt himself bob into his brother's mouth and the feeling of need and the warmth in his groin only increased when Kankuro forced his legs apart even more to have complete control of Gaara's body.

He couldn't help but shiver. At some point he was sure Kankuro had asked for the lube but he wasn't sure if he'd answered him or not since he was in a complete daze at the moment. He could barely think a straight thought at the moment since his senses were overflowing but for some reason he simply didn't care since he was getting what he wanted.

Suddenly he felt something moist slip into him and slowly move back and forth and he couldn't help but quiver. A moment later another. Kankuro was preparing him for what would come, the pleasure that would come soon. Just needed more patience but his brother was moving so slow it was getting frustrating!

"Kankuro..!"

Gaara squirmed in frustration of not getting what he wanted fast enough but his brother didn't seem to listen and kept on teasing him while sucking him. It was way too slow to let him come but it was definitely enough to make him go crazy in a short amount of time.

"Patience, Gaara. You wanted this, you're getting it but on my terms. Lay back and enjoy or I leave."

That wasn't true of course and both of them knew it even though Gaara had a slight thought of despair and a thought of what if, but that disappeared once yet another finger penetrated him. He bobbed in Kankuro's hand while his mouth let moans and whimpers escape.

Just as he pulled his legs up a little higher, Kankuro sat up but before Gaara could look up and ask what he was doing and if he'd leave, his brother turned him around to his stomach. Gaara couldn't do anything but comply. He stood on his knees but leaned on his chest since his hands were tied.

"Kankuro.. what.. Ooh!"

Gaara gasped when he suddenly felt something warm and slick just tracing his entrance, it caused him to hitch a breath just as another one came. Was Kankuro licking him? What ever he was doing, it made Gaara's toes curl and he once again closed his eyes and just allowed himself to feel.

A hand touched his balls but just missing to touch his erect shaft which made him go a bit crazy. The feather light touch kind of tickled but still teased enough to make him yearn for more touch. The kazekage couldn't help but let a desperate moan escape his lips which made Kankuro move around behind him but he couldn't tell what he was doing, Gaara was simply unable to even open his eyes and even if he did he wasn't sure if he'd be able to see anything due to the pleasure that was taking over his body.

Kankuro gave Gaara a soft kiss on his hip before he positioned himself behind his brother without allowing himself to touch Gaara's erection even though he wanted to. It would make Gaara yearn for it even more and especially now when he was tied up and couldn't touch himself.

With that in mind, he placed his own erection by Gaara's pucker and started to tease him by gently pushing at it but without no real intent of going to enter him just yet. He could hear Gaara going more and more crazy by it too and just when he heard Gaara loosing the last bit of his mind, did he enter him slow but completely. Kankuro moaned himself where he stood on his knees with his hands on Gaara's hips.

"Unbelievably good"

He whispered to himself while feeling Gaara's pucker quivering around him. His brother's moans were so intoxicating to hear that he had to force himself not to release there and then. Kankuro swallowed and waited a little longer before he moved, both to let Gaara adjust to his size like last time, but also to regain control over himself.

Kankuro slowly pulled out so only the tip was still inside before he pushed inside again. Everything so slow but so good. Gaara was getting frustrated again and Kankuro could only guess he was leaking precum again. That's what he did when Kiba mounted him like this in the beginning of his exploration of him being gay or not, a bit of a surprise but still. Kankuro had also realized then, that he liked being on top a lot more than being on the bottom.

He leaned down over Gaara's body and kissed his shoulder and picked up the pace a little right after pushing Gaara's legs together so he stood knee by knee with Kankuro's legs on the outside making sure he didn't spread them. This position made the pucker a little bigger and easier to move into even tough it was still tight.

"Mh... Kami... Gaara!"

He just earned another moan from his brother but it was enough for him to feel he was loosing it himself. You could only keep control for so long before your instincts took over and in this case it was the instinct of breeding.

Gaara felt himself get penetrated, felt the tease and the heard the moans of his brother. Everything the puppet master did made him feel so good and to be honest, he never wanted this to end at the same time he wanted to cum so bad. Kankuro seemed to have other ideas though. While his brother was still inside, he felt him shift a bit on the bed but soon leaned down and over him again.

While slowly rocking into him, Kankuro reached his hands down between his legs and Gaara was thrilled for a moment but then felt something getting tied around his balls and hard shaft. It wasn't too hard he still had some form of circulation but it was enough to feel a bit weird at the same time he felt even more horny.

"You'll love this"

His brother whispered to him and tied the final knot on what ever it was he'd used for rope. Not until then did Kankuro's hands travel over his shaft and tip at the same time he pushed into his brother.

Gaara moaned and wanted to do something, anything but he wasn't sure what. Besides he couldn't do much with his hands tied and now his erection and balls too. Not to mention Kankuro was still standing in a way that made it impossible to move his legs anywhere. Gaara's heart was fluttering while his senses had taken over hand of basically everything.

"I'm going to make you feel so good, Gaara"

Kankuro whispered and picked up the pace while aiming for a certain sweet spot. He wanted his baby brother to feel good sexual bodily tension since Gaara had expressed that Kankuro had been the one to make him feel the last time they had sex.

All of a sudden Gaara felt overwhelmed by pleasure and he moaned with each thrust Kankuro did. He found it hard to breathe because of it, even so he kept moaning. He wouldn't last long if Kankuro kept thrusting into him like that! His abdomen tightened and he felt himself coming so much closer to releasing. His senses were tingling and when he opened his eyes all he could see was white spots.

"K- .. Kan..k!"

With a loud moan Gaara felt himself wanting to release but simply couldn't. Nothing came out no matter how much his groin fought to release and it caused him to hitch for breath while Kankuro kept thrusting a few more times before he eased the pace down again.

Gaara managed to get one of his hands out from the tie and was just on his way to feel what the rope was that his brother had wrapped around his shaft and balls. Just before he made it, a firm hand gripped his wrist and instead placed his hand behind his back.

"na-ah.. no cheating, Gaara."

Kankuro's voice was so dark, husky and luring and it turned Gaara on more than ever, he closed his eyes again. He even felt a bit dizzy but he wasn't sure if it was because of Kankuro, or if it was because he couldn't release when he felt the need to do so. Was this part of the game? The agony that somehow turned into unspeakable pleasure? His heart raced so hard, he needed more!

Kankuro couldn't keep himself in control for much longer he knew that much but he wanted Gaara to enjoy this as much as possible, not to mention himself. One of his dreams were coming true by the words his brother had said earlier. His baby brother was Gay! Just like he was. And he was doing a dream of his at the moment.

"gnh... can't hold back much longer.."

"T-then don't..."

Gaara's voice basically pleaded for Kankuro to release himself inside of him and so he would. The puppet master once again picked up the pace but this time he leaned down over Gaara's back while keeping his brother's hand on his back and by his own chest, he wouldn't allow his baby brother to touch himself.

The bed was basically rocking with them right now but none of them seemed to care or think twice about it. Kankuro's hand reached down between Gaara's legs and began to fondle his balls and then his shaft, teasing him until he wanted to cum again but just as last time, he couldn't. This time was much stronger though, the muscles to get his seed out fought even harder to do their job but failed yet again and Gaara was getting to the brink of insanity by being denied to do just that.

He whimpered a little while being rocked back and forth by his brother's thrusting, his hand was still fondling him and Gaara couldn't do much more but to feel the build up starting over inside again. Each breath was hitched, each exhale was a moan and Kankuro moaned with him with every thrust.

Gaara's toes curled again when the build up was beginning to reach its limit again and he opened his mouth in a silent scream just as he heard Kankuro groan deep in his throat and started to pulsate inside of him. All of a sudden Gaara felt himself release with such a force that it made him dizzy and couldn't help but make a slight scream of pleasure because of it. His shaft pulsated so hard to get the semen out.

Kankuro kept rubbing him and thrusting into him until he couldn't take it anymore and released again. Every time he was getting more and more sensitive until he finally couldn't take it anymore and called out for him to please stop and only earned a chuckle in his ear to begin with. Gaara released again but this time empty even though the ropes fell from his genitals the moment before due to Kankuro's hand releasing the ropes. Gaara ended up on his stomach in his own semen while gasping for air and trying to understand what just happened.

Kankuro placed himself partly on top of his brother since he was still inside of him and would be until he became flaccid. He released Gaara's hand that was still tied to the bed post then kissed his brother's cheek.

"Was it ok?"

"...mh... more than..."

Gaara whispered and smiled in his own bliss of release while feeling his heart pounding so hard in his chest that he thought it'd break free at one point or another. Kankuro kept kissing his neck and shoulder lovingly and Gaara just closed his eyes to feel it. For the first time in a little over a week, he felt good, content and just... calm, at ease with himself.

Kankuro felt himself slip out of his brother and not until then did he move to place himself behind Gaara and snuggled up to him right after fishing the covers up from the footer of the bed. It didn't seem that Gaara even cared that he was laying in his own semen and right now, neither did Kankuro since his brother hadn't complained about it.

"Thank you... niisan."

Gaara whispered tiredly right before he fell asleep and Kankuro kissed his cheek again and moved some strands of his red hair away from his face to see the kanji a bit more. 'Love', was that what Kankuro was meant to give him? Was it meant to be like this? How could he deny his baby brother anything? If this was what it'd take to make Gaara get back to his own two feet, then this was what he'd do. It wasn't like he was suffering while doing it.

"Sweet dreams, otouto"

"nh..."

Kankuro pulled the covers up over them then wrapped his arms around his brother's chest and snuggled in with his nose by the nape of Gaara's neck. The sun had made a silver lining by the horizon by now but none of the boys knew or cared about that at the moment. They were too into their own bliss to even care.


End file.
